Friday, July 30, 2010

Home Sweet Home: Cleveland Rocks! pt. 1

I've just returned from a whirlwind trip of my home town, Cleveland.  I know, I know, you are screaming at your monitor right now, "What are you talking about WeaselMomma? You live in Chicago and you grew up in Philadelphia!".  Yes, that is all true.  The home of my childhood is Philadelphia, but the hometown of my adult life is Cleveland, even though I have hung my hat in Chicago for the past 12 years, It will always be Cleveland that holds my heart.

I love the place and it's people.  It's the most genuinely welcoming city I have ever been to.  It has all the perks and culture of cities 5 times its size, like a world class zoo, amazing museums and restaurants of famous homegrown chefs, but without the traffic issues, high costs or sterile coldness that we have come to expect from such places.

We did so many mind blowing cool things in 3 days and 2 nights that I will be telling you all about in a series of posts, just to tell you about the uber cool highlights.  I mean where else can you possibly hand feed giraffes, experience the worlds best Amusement Park and amazing roller coasters, stay in an affordable, luxurious, lake view accommodations, hide under the sink in the house from A Christmas Story, learn the secrets of the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame that the 'suits' running the place weren't even privy too (thanks to a museum docent), shop in the largest indoor/outdoor market in the country, enjoy free outdoor concerts while visiting beautiful botanical gardens and view world class art, science and natural history museums and serendipitously meet and share a drink with Mick Brown  (drummer for Ted Nugent) on the streets?



Oh yeah, Cleveland Rocks!  Thanks to Cedar Point* and Positively Cleveland* (the CVB) I am now extremely homesick.  Stay tuned to read about the highlights of the my getaway and have a chance to win the incredible (and yet to be announced - but it will be cool) giveaway that I am putting together for those who do.

*Sponsors of this wonderful whirlwind tour.

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Tuesday, July 27, 2010

A Boy and His Dog

There is no doubt that ever since Matilda the Hun joined the ranks of the Weasel Family, she has been well loved by all.  She is loyal and loving to all of us in exchange.  However, Matilda and Boy Weasel have turned into the classic cliche of a boy and his dog.

Being a pony dog, Matilda is not aloud on any of the furniture, including the beds.  Boy Weasel wanted to sleep with her from the very beginning, so he came up with a solution.  Boy took all his bed clothes and turned them into a makeshift sleeping pallet on the floor of his bedroom that he shares with the dog at bedtime.



Boy hates leaving home without her.  He walks her and cleans up after her.  They play together for hours on end before cuddling up on the living room floor to watch some T.V. or take a nap.  He's already started lamenting about how he is going to take her to college with him and he doesn't seemed phased by the idea that will happen over my dead body can't happen.  He's still only 13.

I derive much joy from seeing how much they love each other and what a special relationship they have.  It also often makes me chuckle to myself.

So the other day, while watching them cuddle together, I mention to Boy in a mock-serious voice that they love each other so much that I am just waiting for the day the Matilda contracts rabies while saving Boy from a rabid wild boar.  I continue on that it might turn out to be a cougar or mountain lion that Matilda meets her demise from while protecting him.  Further more, maybe it will be bear that attempts to attack Boy and gives Matilda the chance to go out as a hero.

Boy just looked at me a chuckled a little, when Middle Weasel inserted her two cents from upstairs, "Mom, why don't they just stay out of the woods?".

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Monday, July 26, 2010

Punk'd

This is the post script or addendum to the the story I told you about on Friday.  On a positive note, I am no longer wearing the magnetic bulls eye for Eldest Weasel's anger.  Also, you can join Melisa is having a great laugh at my expense.

On the negative side of things, Eldest Weasel had her heart broken.  A trusted aunt had caused her pain, tears and embarrassment. 

Here's how it went down; On Friday, my sister packed her family up in their car and headed home.  Melisa and I commenced with what turned into an outstanding and fun episode of Suburban Wow.  All the while, Eldest had been texting back and forth with her aunt, who continued to string her along.

After the show, Melisa and I chatted in the kitchen over some leftover pizza.  Eldest Weasel came to join us, phone in hand, to show the most recent text picture that her aunt had sent, The Picture.  Eldest Weasel said, 'I don't think that's him".  I of course assured her that it was him, because her Aunt would never trick her like that.  Melisa looked at the pic and concurred that it wasn't him, "His face isn't round enough".  I say what kind of 40 something woman knows the face of Justin Bieber in such intricate detail.  

I wave that off as nothing, as people always comment to me that I look different in every picture of me that they see and when meeting me in person I hear about how I don't look anything like my avatar.  Melisa laughs at me and says, "That's not him".

Eldest Weasel texts her aunt back to call foul and her aunt responds by copping to a fraud.  Eldest was crushed.  I tried to laugh it off, as my siblings are apt to regularly punk each other ever since we were children.  However, we never went so far as to involve our nieces and nephews in a prank that would hurt them.  Each other however, are fair game.

Melisa continued to mock me and have a good laugh, but had nothing but sympathy to offer Eldest, "This is my Purple Rain tour all over again".  Watch the re-run of Suburban Wow to hear that story.  

After Melisa left, Eldest broke down.  Tears fell as she continued texting with her aunt to let her know how upset, saddened and angry she was that her aunt had tricked her like this.  My sister texted back an apology, but Eldest still let her know that her other aunt is her favorite.

Basically, the headline sums up the story.  We were punk'd.

.....and my sister wonders why I don't pack up the family and drive 22 hours to come visit.

PS ~ I would post the pic, but Eldest was so ticked off that she deleted it.

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Friday, July 23, 2010

There's A Storm Brewing in Weaselville

Yup, yours truly just stepped in it. Big. Time.  There is a-storm-a-brewing in Weaselville and I am in direct path of its eye.

First, some back round information.  Eldest Weasel (16) has been miffed at me for a few weeks now (that girl sure can hold a grudge), ever since I turned down her request to allow her to drive 4 hours to Indianapolis with some friends to attend a Justin Bieber concert.  After all, his Chicago show is sold out and the next logical thing to do is to let my teen leave the state with my car and my money to go see the tot/tween heartthrob in Indiana.  I am such an unreasonable Mom.

Eldest somehow is completely enamored with him, even though his core fan base seems to be six to ten year old girls.  Even her younger sisters point and laugh tease and mock her about her taste in heartthrobs.  Boy Weasel thinks he's kind of cool things that make you go Hmmm.

On a seemingly unrelated note,  my sister who lives many states away, is visiting here right now with her family.  They are on a cross country driving vacation and stopping to spend time with family in many different states.  I mentioned before that she wanted us to meet up with them in damn near Canada the Upper Peninsula of Michigan and join them for camping with her husbands family.  I don't camp.  Weasels nest in fluffy comfy beds with cable and wi-fi.  The Weasels kind of liked the idea, well except for the camping part, but quickly and easily accepted as gospel truth that there was no way in hell I was driving them 9 hours to camp.

Anywho, yesterday my sister and her family arrived here in Weaselville.  Eldest Weasel was off at an amusement park with her friends and would not be home until very late yes, there was adult supervision.   As we chowed down on some pizza, my sister started showing me some of the vacation pics that they had taken. They were all lovely and looked like a lot of fun was had, but one in particular really jumped out at me.  It was the one with my 7 year old niece sitting and kicking back with Justin Bieber!!!!!!!!!!!!  Yeah.  It turns out that Justin and my brother in law are cousins.

Eldest Weasel is going to be waking up soon and you know the first priority of her siblings is to show her the pics of the camping trip.  Yeah, they can't wait to see the fireworks show.  I have no idea where they got such a sick and twisted sense of humor.

Yup, there's a storm brewing in Weaselville and I'm left holding a lightning rod.


Image credit goes to Tonsoftickets.com
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Friday, July 16, 2010

Brave, Stupid or Seasoned?

I have an equation for you.  What do you get when you add 4 teens, 2 tweens, a disgruntled, vertically challenged 8 year old just getting over illness, a 6 year old thrill seeker, a meek Sunday drive style 6 year old,  2 battle hardened moms, 90+ยบ F temps and the roller coaster capital of the world?

YOU GET THE WEASEL VACATION!!!!!!!!!

Yesterday was the pinnacle of the annual Weasel trek to Lake Erie, the day the Weasels anxiously await year round........ the trip to Cedar Point Amusement Park. 

That's right, my dear friend and I ventured out yet again with 9 kids into 364 acres of thrills and insanity.  Don't worry, we are professionals and have a combined 38 years of trench warfare parenting experience.

We entered the park as soon as it opened and executed our game plan of fulfilling Monkey Weasel's life long dream of finally being tall enough tho ride the Top Thrill Dragster.  Monkey strong armed me pleaded with me to wait and extra hour in line in order to ride in the front car of this roller coaster of death that launches you via hydraulics from 0 to 120mph in 4 seconds in order to send you corkscrewing vertically up 420 feet, immediately followed by a vertical death spiral decent back down in 17 seconds of hoping you remembered to pay up your life insurance policy pure thrill and excitement.  They should really rename this thing The Near Death Experience.  Yes, I would ride it again.  It is pure awesome sauce with a side of Holy Crap!  Monkey Weasel however, swore off mega coasters for the rest of the day.



 With 9 kids at the park at one time, there is bound to be someone having a meltdown at any given time.  BFF and I could be decorated fire fighters, purely based on the number of fires we managed to put out in one day.

Our thrill seeker of a six year old was absolutely indignant at having to spend some time on the 'baby rides' with her meek counterpart.  She's too cool for school and wanted to feel the wind through her hair in the front seat of the Iron Dragon and felt the humiliation of being seen riding the Merry Go Round in the same way a teen would feel at being seen near their parents, complete with menacing stare and eye roll.  Not to worry though, she did get to ride the coaster of her dreams, in the front seat no less, before the day was out.

With all of our experience having herded cats taken this same crew to Cedar Point many times before, BFF and I were savvy enough to send the 2 teenage boys off on their own and bribe the 2 teenage girls with cold hard cash to take the kids on rides for a while so that we could go grab ourselves some ice cold beers and relax have some grownup time and ride a few things ourselves.

I had a good laugh when we were carded and BFF didn't have an ID with her.  Her oldest daughter is of legal drinking age, yet she couldn't get served a beer.  I did what any good friend would do pointed and laughed and bought one for her.  It felt reminiscent of high school.

A few more rides after meeting back up with the entire gang and it was time to stop for dinner.  Here is the best tip I can give you about Cedar point:  Right outside the park gates there is a Famous Dave's BBQ right at the marina.  You get to sit down and eat a real meal in air conditioning.  It is refreshing and relaxing and we can feed 11 people for $120, including tip.  That's about the same you can spend in the park on hot dogs, burgers and fries for 11.   Our waiter was Dave (sadly not the famous one) and he was fantasmic!   He patiently and laughingly took the orders of 11 picky eaters and got it all right.  He was fun and jovial and even let the kids take a picture of him wearing a sombrero that they had won inside the park.  We like Dave.  He deserves a raise.

After dinner was a few more rides, adventures and meltdowns to enjoy before the park was closing.  After a day of being extremely careful about the type of rides I personally would go on (as to NOT aggravate my back problems), I got on a small children's  ride with the youngest 2, one of which was too short to ride unless I rode with her.  Sure enough, it screwed up my back, bad.  That's embarrassing.   I can handle the colossal coaster of doom, but the 'baby rides' proved themselves too daunting.  I'm pathetic.

All in all, it was a great day of fun, sun and thrills and after a full day like that, today will literally be a day at the beach.

Fatherhood Friday at Dad Blogs

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Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Go Jump in a Lake

After all, that it was I am doing.

Right now, I am sitting on a back porch of a summer cottage overlooking a breathtaking view of Lake Erie.

I have done this just about every year for the past 14.

I am with the Weasels, a dear friend and her beautiful children.  Mr. Weasel is home making the scratch so that we can do things like, go on vacation.  Dear friends husband is doing the same.  So for one week every summer, I get some downtime with the Weasels with a side of girl time with a friend that I only get to see once a year.

We go jump in the lake.  We take the kids for a day at the beach and some years when the stars are aligned, like this year, we take the gang to Cedar Point.

I'll keep you all updated as the week goes on and hopefully post some pics.

Now, I'm going to go jump in a lake.

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Thursday, July 8, 2010

If I had Only Known Then

There is is a song called A Letter To Me with the premise of if you could write a letter from yourself, at present, and send it to you, as a struggling teenager.  If I could send my current life knowledge and experience back to my young self, this is what I would tell me.

If I only knew then what I know now.

Angelo is a friend whose heart you don't want to break.  Be careful with it.

Mom and Dad weren't always right in their actions, but they will never give you bad advice.  Listen to their advice.

Don't smoke.  You'll regret it.

Skip the trip to North Carolina when you are 16.  No good comes of it. 

You'll make some awesome and incredible friends over the years.  Keep them close, but weed out the losers sooner rather than later.

Spend Senior Week with your friends. (see above)

You can do anything you put your mind to.  Don't let anyone ever tell you that you can't.

You are beautiful.  Everyone knows it and assumes you do too.  You need to realize it.

You are smart and sharp.  Adults recognize this in you.  You need to recognize it now instead of when you are 30.

Don't pay any mind when teachers or professors tell you you can't write.  You just don't write what they want you to.  You can write.  Always write from within and be true to yourself.

You're going to kiss a lot of frogs, and have a lot of heartache through your search,  but you will find your Prince right under your nose when you least expect it.

Your future Mother in Law is not the anti-Christ.  Get past your differences.  She's a loving mother doing the best she can - just the same as you will be.

Spend as much time with Mom and Dad while you can.  They won't be around forever.

You will have more joy in your life than you ever knew possible.

You're life will have some extreme heartbreaks.  You will survive them, I promise.
 -Hold close to your Prince for dear life when you do.  You will hold each other up.

Reach out further to your sisters, especially when they pull away.

Do your best everyday.

Love with your entire being.

You'd never be able to fully appreciate the joys without the heartbreaks.

Don't forget who to thank.

I guess what I am saying is: Use your head.  Be yourself. It all works out.  Don't worry, you are just stuck in The Middle.




It's a bitter shame that we must learn these lessons in life for ourselves and that we can't pass this gained knowledge down to our off spring.  No matter how hard we try.


Fatherhood Friday at Dad Blogs

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Wednesday, July 7, 2010

A Face Only A Mother Could Love

Once upon a time, in a hospital maternity ward not so far away, Mr. Weasel and I sat bedside in the special care nursery with Weasel version 5.0 as she needed a little care and monitoring in those first days of life.

Our baby was the only resident of the nursery and thus we had the place to ourselves, with the exception of the nursing staff that were by default her private staff.  The only time other babies came in and out from the nursery were for short little visits involving blood work or foot printing.

Some of the babies that came through were gorgeous little cherubs.  MY children wee all born looking like this. Some of them were squishy little newborns that had made their world debut just minutes earlier, but were darling nonetheless.  There were babies that were aesthetically challenged, see naked mole rat  yet cute and one, only one......the only one I have ever seen with with my own eyes, was down right ugly.

This baby was wheeled into the nursery in a rolling bassinet and parked across the room from where our butts were parked.  I, being a lover of babies - especially newborns, had a big awww and sigh as the little guy came into to nursery shrieking as loud as a newborn can.  The nurse paid no attention immediately as she finished up 20 seconds of paperwork.  I asked the nurse if I might comfort the baby and she stated that was against the rules. She washed her hands and walked over to give the newborn his misplaced pacifier before washing up again and coming to give our little cherub her medical treatment.

Thirty seconds later, this transient nursery mate was pipes a screaming again.  This time the nurse was gloves on trying to maneuver with a needle and teeny tiny little baby parts with our daughter.  Mr. Weasel, who can't stand to see a newborn go un-comforted either asked if he may give the the little fella his pacifier back, being that the nurse had her hands already full.  She looked around and gave the okay, as long as Mr. W washed his hands first.  Thus, Mr. Weasel did and soon the baby was quiet again.

Within seconds of the little guy getting his comfort plug back and Mr. W. returning to our destined to be a super model baby, the little dude lost it again.  Newborns not being known how to hold their latex lollipops of glory on their own for too long.  I said "It's my turn" and washed up.

I walked quickly to the bassinet and set eyes on the poor little fella for the first time and instantly emitted from my lungs a screech from deep within my soul and jumped back with a start.  Both the Mr. and the nurse spontaneously laughed with the knowledge of what had caught me so off guard and caused this extreme reflex.

This was the ugliest child ever born.  RoseMary's baby would have been like, "Wow, is that kid ugly!".  I swear the kids nose was the same size and shape of Jimmy Durante's as an adult.  The rest of his face was gremlinesque and just to top it off, his parents had accessorized him in over sized booties and a matching  cone shaped elf hat.  Thus completing the look that this baby was some kind of evil gnome that you would only place in the garden bed of Beelzebub.

I tended the poor little guy while I explored the thought of what a rough life he had in front of him and returned to my baby with the nurse and Mr. Weasel still in stitches.  "Yeah, we had been thinking the same thing", they managed to squeak out between chuckles.

I then had a morbid curiosity of what the parents must look like.  The nurse laughed a knowing laugh, but made no further comment.  I speculate that they may have been a gargoyle and a three horned goat.

Well, that's my one and only ugly baby sighting.  I wish that kid the best in life and hope that he had just been having a long and hard first day in his life, but I really doubt it.  For this was a face only a Mother could love.

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Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Tuesday Tidbits

Ah, another holiday weekend is behind us.  We were pretty low key around here, just sticking close to Weaselville and hanging out with the neighbors.  However, life in Weaselville is never dull or scripted, thus I offer you these odd tidbits that represent a snapshot of our weekend.

  • Friday was a special family day.  We took the Weasels out for lunch and then to Build A Bear Workshop.  Boy Weasel named his bear Rusty Shackleford (bonus points to any of you who get the reference) and Eldest Weasel named hers PeaceyP.  The younger and better grounded children went a little more mainstream with Mindy, Bubbly and Mr. Fudgy.


  • I wrote a July 4th post on, well, July 4th Yes, I am a trailblazing original.  I thought it was quite good I really like the author, but it didn't garner that much attention being posted on a Sunday of a holiday weekend and all.  It did however gain the attention of whatever government agency lurks the Internet for possible threats US Department of Creepy Big Brother Internet Stalking, who not only visited that post, but liked it so much they decided to visit some links in my blogroll of recommended reading too!

  • Maybe I have it all wrong and that it's just that the FBI has ESP.  Maybe someone working there had a premonition that within 24 hours there would be mass destruction and carnage in Weaselville with The great Watermelon Massacre of '10 and were that they were just trying to get a jump start on the investigation.  However, in order to save taxpayer dollars, Mr. Weasel and I conducted the investigation and ruled it a tragic accident.  We also took care of the clean up effort ourselves because our home could have been devoured by maggots by the time the federal government did anything about clean up efforts


  • My sister called and wants us to join her family for a week of camping in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.  There are a few problems with this for me.
  1. I hate camping.
  2. My idea of 'roughing it' is drinking well liquor.
  3. I don't want to spend $200+ on a tent/air mattress/gear.
  4. I don't want to drive 8 hours north to damn near Canada a place where they are still having overnight frost warnings.  No offense to my Canadian friends, I just don't dig your weather. 
Yeah, I really don't see that trip happening.

  • I have never received hate mail during my 2 yrs of blogging.  I've never been sent a message that someone wants to have my babies, like someone I know has.  I've never even gotten any particularly nasty comments nor have I been told what a bad mother I am.  Hmmmm, maybe I'm not doing this blogging thing right.

Oh, BTW, This Friday is the next episode of Suburban Wow!  Info and the link will be up on the shows info blog pageDawn Meehan, author of Because I said So will be joining Melisa and I.  So if you you like to laugh and have fun, forget about Bravo and come watch the real housewives of the suburbs in action on Suburban Wow.

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Sunday, July 4, 2010

Let Freedom Ring!

On this day 234 years ago, a document was displayed in the town square behind Independence Hall in Philadelphia, having been signed and decreed by the 2nd Continental Congress that a new nation had been birthed from the wounds oppression and tyranny.

It read, in part:

 We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. That to secure these rights, governments are instituted among men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed. That whenever any form of government becomes destructive to these ends, it is the right of the people to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their safety and happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shown that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such government, and to provide new guards for their future security. --Such has been the patient sufferance of these colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former systems of government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute tyranny over these states.
No really, go back and read that paragraph in full.  It's really important and pertinent stuff.

These were the words that started a Revolution.  These were principles that the signers, our Founding Fathers, were willing to risk their own lives, liberty, families, wealth and property to ensure for themselves and future generations.

These are principles that this beautiful nation was founded upon, later to be deemed a nation "of, by and for the People'.

I urge the current government administration, members of Congress, Supreme Court justices and each and every citizen of these United States to go back and take another look at these words and those of the U.S. Constitution.  Read them carefully and take them to heart. Understand how carefully crafted those words are and why.   They were written with purpose and intention.  They are words for all of us to live up to and these words have been taken for granted for far too long.

We all remember,  "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.", but how many of us neglect the rest of the paragraph, in particular;
"That to secure these rights, governments are instituted among men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed. That whenever any form of government becomes destructive to these ends, it is the right of the people to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their safety and happiness."  and "Prudence, indeed, will dictate that governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shown that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such government, and to provide new guards for their future security.".

As we celebrate our nations birthday today with cook-outs, friends, family, cold beer and fireworks let us not forget what or why we are celebrating and  remember to live up to the principles that are our inheritance, left to us by people who were willing to give their lives to ensure these principles and our freedom.  We have many responsibilities that go hand in hand with our rights and freedoms  We have mighty big shoes to fill as the heirs of such men.

Let us never squander our inheritance. Let Freedom Ring.

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Thursday, July 1, 2010

At least the Mythbusters Get Paid For their Antics

These are some tough economic times that we are living in.  You and I alike are looking for ways to save money in any area of the budget that we can.  I am not a bargain blogger, but I have decided to share with you some tips on what has worked for me and what hasn't.*

We ladies like to look our best, but professional grooming can get rather expensive.  No, it's not necessary for survival, but it is necessary for our own mental well being.  A justifiable expense, but not at salon prices.  That happy medium?


The Do It Yourself Bikini Wax

Step 1:  Go to your local dollar store and secure yourself a large tub of "Do it Yourself Microwavable Hair Removal Wax" for the the bargain price of $1 a gallon.  What a deal!

Step 2:  Melt wax in the microwave alongside the kids lunch, chimichangas.  I'm all about multitasking and just think what you are saving on your energy bill!

Step 3:  Stir wax, flip chimichangas and continue heating both thoroughly.

Step 4:  Serve chimichangas at the kitchen table and take the wax, that is now more like hot molten lava than wax,  to an upstairs bathroom and lock the door.

Step 5: Apply hot lava wax to your bikini line and start second guessing your decision to save money in this particular area.

Step 6:  After wax cools for 2 or 3 seconds, put thoughts of possible third degree burns out of your head and focus on the task in front of you.

Step 7:  Carefully start to lift the bottom edge of the wax.  Just enough to get a grip on it with your fingers and remind yourself how much money you are saving.

Step 8:  Tear away from the skin in a rapid motion, while you recite every possible offensive word you have ever heard at the top of your lungs.

Step 9:  Do not answer the bathroom door!  Using your most calming voice, assure the children who came running at the sound of your distress call, that Mommy is okay, and everything is fine, from the opposite side of the locked door.

Step 10:  Realize the the hot molten lava managed to tear off lots of skin but somehow left everything else completely untouched.

Step 11:  Start swearing again, but this time in a low grumble to yourself and give up.

Step 12:  Decide that you may not have had success with the bikini wax and decide that eyebrows are still worth a try.  Always be a positive thinker. wash your face thoroughly and try not to freak out that you just applied wax to your face from the same tub you used on, well not your face.

Step 13:  After failure #2, realize that you are a moron and at least the Mythbusters get paid for their antics.

Hope this helps you all to know where not to skimp in the budget!

Tune in next time when I give myself a frontal lobotomy!

Do Not Try This At Home!  I am what we call an idiot.

Only yours truly was hurt in the making of this post.

*If I ever find any bargain tips that work for me, I'll share them.

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