Mac The Cat Speaks

*Today I have a Special Guest Post for you, by none other than Mac The Cat*

Hello all. Allow me introduce myself. I am Mac. You may remember me from such post as Ho, Ho, Ho'n in Weaselville and my cameo in The Dark Side of the Hundred Acre Wood. I have been residing in Weaselville for the past two years, ever since I conned Mr. Weasel into thinking I would be friendly to him and fun to cuddle up with. Today I am here with a public service message for all of you Tom Cats out there.

Tom Cats, do you ever get that "I've been neutered feeling"? With no one to climb the front tree with and talk to because you don't know who the heck your daddy is? You can't talk to the vet, because he is the one who amputated you in the first place? Your mind says, Yes! Yes!, but your body says, Meh?

Do you ever think to yourself, "I should want it but I don't. This never happens to other cats my age"? You see that sweet little calico climbing the banister, like she was born for the pole, and yet nothing? You've forced yourself to give it the old college try, cause let's face it, it's the only thing gonna shut up her incessant begging and whining, only to have her mock you to all the other cats because you weren't up to the job?

If you can relate, boy do I have good news for you. There is this wonderful product called Cat Nip! No, you will still won't be able to please that little calico in your life, but a few whiffs of this stuff and you really won't care! You will feel like Super-Kitty, no matter what your shortcomings.

So there you have it, Cat Nip. The solution to all of your Tom Cat problems. Now don't forget to regularly puke up a hairball on the carpeting, just to get some payback to those that did this to you in the first place.