To Mr. Weasel, CFO Weaselville

Dear Mr. Weasel,

I have been with Weasels incorporated since it's inception 17 years ago. In that time I have been instrumental in Weaselville's success and growth of 400%, through my partnership with you. Along with my running much of the day to day operations and you being a key factor in making the company a good investment, we have built something that continually increases in value.

At this time I would like to reiterate and renew my commitment to the company, and my undying loyalty to partnering with you.

Over the course of my relationship with the company and in working closely with you, we have made a great team and guided our employs through relocation of the corporate headquarters 6 times, 6 children permanent acquisitions, numerous temporary fish, hamsters, frogs, guinea pig and long term dogs, cats partnerships with transient team members.

Working together, we have weathered numerous fiscal storms, company infighting and hostile takeover attempts from those climbing the corporate ladder. We have celebrated our successes and mourned major corporate losses and crisis. However, our stock never dipped by one one red cent.

We have built a solid foundation for a lasting legacy to continue the growth of our empire for countless generations to come. I value my time and investment in the company more than anything else in my life. It has by far been my greatest achievement. Partnering with you, to accomplish all we have together has brought me amazing levels of satisfaction. I look forward to our continuing success through the coming years and plan to die at my desk.

All that being said, do you think you could give me a raise. *wink*

Happy Anniversary my love. Seventeen is just the beginning. I love you even more today than this date 17 years ago. That's something that I never even thought possible. Thanks for making me your CEO and building this company from the ground up with me. You really are great with start-ups and I value all that you are, have been and will be for me.

I love you now and for always,

WeaselMomma

Dinner and Dessert

We all know that the traditional gift for the 1st anniversary is paper, the 10th is diamonds, 25th is silver, and 50th is gold. But last night Hubby and I discovered that the 15th is candy. For that is what was gifted to us from the bushweasels. Gobs and gobs and gobs of candy. Enough candy that i suspect they knocked off the Easter Bunny. They must not have held up a bank, for no lollipops were involved.
It was very sweet of them, pun intended. Considering they never ever did a damn thing for our anniversary before. After we've fed and bathed them for years, the little ingrates. We were very grateful, touched and naive. This was actually a bushweasel ambush disguised as an act of loving generosity.
The gifts were numerous and painstakingly individually gift wrapped. There was a bag of carmel creams, a Hershey Bar with almonds, A 3 Musketeers, a Kit Kat, An Almond Joy, 2 Cow Tails, 2 boxes of Bertie Bott's every flavor beans, 2 packages of Gummi Slugs, a box of Andies Candies, a large box of Jelly Bellies and a pound bag of Hershey's Kissables.
When the time came, we opened our presents with delight. We were amused by the thought that went into them. At which point a small voice announces "It's for sharing!". That translates from weaselesse into "it's our candy and you can have some". I'm sure they were thinking "the suckers fell for it! What a couple of dumb asses! That was too easy, we need to a challenge next time". There was only time for laughter and no arguing because Hubby and I were running late for our night of romance.
Now on to our hot date. Hubby was tired and flustered after a busy day at work and rushing home in time to make our date. His spirits were good, but he could have used some spirits. My spirits were flying high, as I was out of the house and the kids were having frozen pizza for dinner. We arrived at the fundraiser and did the social hellos and the meet and great. Eventually finding our way to the table of regulars that we choose to call friends.
Soon the contest would begin. 12 men, some disguised as women and children, 1 hour, and pasta with meatballs in 2 lb. bowls. Gentlemen, start your gorging! The race was on who for who could stuff their pie hole the most. This was the 1st eating contest that I have ever attended. Surprisingly, it wasn't nearly as disgusting as I had imagined. Or maybe I am just too used to sitting down to a table where eating habits aren't nearly as good as they should be.
In the end, Hubby did just fine. He didn't win, not even close, but did manage to shove in 3 1/2 lbs. of pasta and 4 meatballs. The overall winner inhaled 5 lbs. 7 oz of the stuff with who knows how many meatballs. The best part was how bloated and ill the guys felt after it was over. Ha! revenge! Now you know what it feels like after eating 1/2 ounce of rice when your 9 months pregnant! Only we can't stop eating once we feel that way, the urge is too strong and the food too plentiful. Hubby even commented that had I been pregnant I could have made the winner look like a lightweight.
We went home and proceeded to bed where our evening culminated with a series of moans and groans. All coming from the other side of the bed as hubby tried to digest all that pasta.
I think this actually counts as a very romantic evening together. If you look at the facts, we had an Italian Dinner at a nice restaurant, gifts of chocolates and moaning and groaning in the bed after we returned home.
You should have it this good!