Monday, August 30, 2010

Eating For Two ~ WeaselMomma Style

*Note: No I am not expecting.

I'm not a big eater, well most of time anyway.  I absolutely love food, but I have such a picky palate that it takes something really special to make it water.  I'm mostly a grazer when it comes to appetite.  Except for during my pregnancies, that is.

During the 54 months of my life that I spent growing a human being inside of me, I gave all new meaning to the phrase eating for two.  I ate every meal like it was my last.  No exaggerations here people.  I gained more than half of my normal body weight with each child.  I was hungry! And just to make you all hate me, I was always back to my regular weight no later than 6 weeks after delivery.

I ate in such a fashion that Dom DeLuise would have backed away from me at the buffet.  You didn't dare stand between me and the roast beef unless you wanted me to take you down like a fullback.  Seriously, it was a spectacle to watch and watch is what people did.

There was an ice cream parlor that Mr. Weasel used to take me to where I would order the biggest sundae that they made, the one that was made to be shared by 3, and would woof it all down by myself.  They would always bring a second spoon, but Mr. Weasel dared not try and use his.  Once another table stuck around long after they had finished, just to watch the show and then picked up my tab and thanked me for the entertainment.

A good friend of ours would treat me and Mr. W. to the Sunday Brunch Buffet at a local restaurant  just because he enjoyed watching the absolute absurdity of the way that I would clear it out.  I used to look at that buffet with little cartoon T-bones in my eyes.

The one that really took the cake though actually, I was always the one who took the cake is the day I struck the original shock and awe into the eyes of a waiter.

We had gone out for a special anniversary dinner.  I was great with Big Macs child and ready to enjoy dinner at my favorite steakhouse.  I had appetizers, side dishes, a 12 oz fillet, a 1 lb loaded baked potato and about 4 baskets of bread without leaving a crumb of evidence in my wake.

The waiter reluctantly came by and asked about dessert.  I enthusiastically jumped on that wagon.  "Yes!  I will have the creme brulee and the death by chocolate".  The waiter attempted to walk away with the order when Mr. Weasel stopped him, "Aren't you going to take my order?".  It was at this point that the poor guy's eyes grew to the size of dinner plates full of fried chicken, au gratin potatoes and asparagus and his jaw hit our table.  He apologized and took Mr. W's order also and walked away in an unbelieving stupor.  Poor guy.

I totally could have won a food eating competition back in those days, only I wouldn't have to dip the hot dogs in water to get them all down fast.

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Saturday, August 28, 2010

In My Arms

In the hours and days after our Claire died I was in a fog of numb denial.  I was honestly expecting to wake up from this horrid nightmare at any moment.  In my mind, none of what had happened could actually be true.  It was far too awful to really be true.  Yet, it was.  My mind just needed to protect myself from the reality in order to preserve any amount of sanity.

Anything that could go wrong that day did and I lived in what I could only describe as a walking coma in those first days.  I was fully functional and at the same time completely nonfunctional.  Life was just motion.  There was no food needed for fuel or sleep to end weariness.  There were only to-do lists carried out in a mechanical fashion.  There was only the natural anesthetic of denial.

On the day of Claire's wake, my sister took me to accomplish the to-dos of the day.  I needed to go buy a dress.  There was nothing in my closet that would fit.  I bought a red one.  I couldn't wear black, there was no need to.  After all, this really couldn't have happened.  Black would make it real.  There would be no black.

Next we had to go pick some flower bouquets on a slim budget.  Our local grocery store had a nice floral department and we walked in to the aroma and beauty of nature's bright colors.  "Ooh, these are pretty!  Oh, what do you think about these?  These would look nice with those!" and suddenly reality began to peek through my psyche like the first rays of sunlight on the dawn.  I froze as grief flooded in and shook my body in heaving sobs.  What was I doing here?  Why was I buying flowers for her funeral.  It felt as unnatural and immoral an act as committing a violent crime.  I had to leave.

My sister and I returned home to a flutter of activity of friends and family members helping to dress and ready the other kids for Claire's wake.  I sat, still unshowered, on the back porch and painted my nails.  Mr. W gently reminded me of the time as I continued to procrastinate.  Softly and kindly, friends tried to move me from the porch and upstairs to ready myself.  I just quietly sat, responding that 'I know', yet I did not move.  After an hour or two, Mr. Weasel came to me a little more firmly and with more urgency about our lack of time and told me that I had to get ready now.  I said "no" very matter of factly.  "I can't.  If I shower, then I will have to get dressed.  If I dress, then we will go to the funeral home.  If we go to the funeral home, then this will be real.  I can't let this be real.  I can't go.  I can't do this".  He then held me tight as I shook and sobbed before guiding me upstairs to prepare.

We arrived at the funeral home with my heart racing in fear of the reality that I was about to face.  I trembled with dread and the knowledge that this was not a bad dream.  Family were already gathered in the common areas.  I could not look to them.  I could only look through them and past them.  I couldn't do this. 

The funeral director approached and took Mr. W and I privately into the viewing room, so that we may have a few moments alone and make sure that all was how we asked it be.  She then sat us down and performed the kindest act that anyone has ever done for us.  She picked up Claire's lifeless little body and placed her in my arms.  We sat and cried and held each other as we held Claire.

The thought of holding a corpse may sound morbid and creepy to some of you, but to us she was not a corpse, she was our little girl and we needed to hold her and to kiss her.  Tears ran down my cheeks and trickled onto the blanket she was swaddled in.  She would be buried with the tears of a mother's love.  A short while later, it was time to place her back in her miniature casket and to open the doors to the crowd that had now formed outside of them.

Holding my child gave me the strength to not only face that crowd, but to do the hardest thing that I have ever been tasked with in my life, say goodbye to her.

*I was inspired to write this post after having read a beautiful post by PJ Mullen about how when you hold your child, all is right with the world.  No doubt that the love we have for our children can carry us through the darkest of times.

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Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Airing Dirty Laundry

A.  I just got back from a wonderful social media summit that was a damn good time chuck full of helpful information, ideas and tidbits.

2.  I only mention that to tell you that I got to spend some time eating, drinking and laughing until I wonder if I will ever get total bladder control back after birthing all of those babies.  Don't even mention the work kegel to me.  You don't know how long, hard and often I laugh.  I would turn into the Arnold Schwarzenegger of girly parts and wouldn't want Mr. Weasel to get hurt.

C.  Speaking of TMI, throw seven women, extreme exhaustion, a few libations, good food and a lack a shyness around a table and realize that the public never really need be subjected to us the topic of an ad campaign that encourages women to You Tube videos showcasing their old, grungy, stained and granny panties is not surprisingly going to be the first topic of conversation.

D.  You will also hear outrageously funny stories like a woman, at the office, spread eagle on a table with her dignity around her ankles and a doily on said woman's butt and you no longer find the concept of having to buy Depends someday nearly as cringe worthy as you had just 20 minutes before.  They suddenly become a useful concept in your life.

E.  When a gentleman standing near your table overhears a soundbite of that conversation, you now are an ideal candidate to make that You Tube video, even if he feels the need to go bleach out his ears.  After all, you now have all the required materials.

6. Someone will decide, with the help of the think tank made up of fellow bloggers drinking with them surrounding them, that she could use a tampon as an antenna ornament, because after all Mac users have those nifty little Apple stickers on their car windows to tell the world that they are too good to use a PC.  smarter than the rest of the world. fell for a marketing ploy. well, Mac users.

I took lots away from this media summit, but most of all I reaffirmed that I LOVE MY JOB!  I can work in my PJ's. I can dress up, live it up and hob nob with some of my favorite people. TMI is not necessarily a bad thing. There are always new friends to be met and gosh darn-it I can pitch depends!

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Monday, August 23, 2010

Young Love

As the last lazy days of summer are winding down here in Weaselville, Mr. Weasel and I decided to take some time to make the most of a quiet Sunday afternoon and the abundance of sunshine that the day had to offer.

We snuck out of the house all by ourselves.  We didn't bring the dog, nor did we allow any Weasels to tag along as they are wont to do each and every time that the Mr. and I try to escape for a quiet walk.

We wandered the neighborhood, hand in hand, and decided to stop when we came to the pond, who's banks of freshly cut grass were incredibly inviting.  We sat down on the bank and drank in the warmth of the cloudless sky as we cuddled and talked in a scene that is now oddly reminiscent of a Cialis commercial.  Things that make you go hmmm.

I felt like a teen again, only better because I had no fear of one of my parents walking by and spotting us.  I snuggled into Mr. Weasel's arms and coyly asked him, "If you were a teenager right now, show me what you would be doing", with an air of mischievousness in my eyes.

As Mr. Weasel started to follow my lead and played along, I leaned in and whispered into his ear, "Keep this in mind the next time your 16 year old daughter wants to take 'a walk down by the pond'".

'Cause we all know, that I am great when it comes to laying traps to snare innocent victims into special moments.

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Friday, August 20, 2010

Some of Ya'll Are Creepy

There is no doubt that I love my readers, both new and old.  Without you, I am writing into a black hole of cyber space.  What fun would that be?  I am grateful for comments left in this space and want to buy a drink for each and every one of my regulars.

The vast majority of those who find themselves on World of Weasels, do so in search of a high quality read.  Poor suckers.  Many of them stick around here anyway and even come back again and again.  I appreciate their never say die attitude and perseverance to hunt down a diamond somewhere within all this rough.

Today however, I am going to share with you some of the more scary strange odd creepy amusing interesting search terms that have led people to this very site.

The priest, hamster and tube of KY jelly ~ I clicked on this search term and do not suggest that you make that same mistake. 

My Sweet Weasel ~ Whoever searched this deserves an umbrella in that drink.

I Love Weasels ~ Right back atcha!

Tramp Wife ~ Dude.  Seriously?  One stinking photo of my cleavage and I'm branded for life?

12yo boy mature ~ This person can feel free to lose my URL.

Benefits of Weasels ~ Of that there are many.  This list could line and entire hamster cage.

Chicks dig weasels, weasels dig chicks ~ M'kay.

Real men play with their weasels ~ You should check with the SPCA before moving forward with this one.

Weasel with rat face ~ Ouch!  I hope this person didn't find what they were looking for here.

What do weasels do most of the time ~ Oh, that's easy!  Weasels love to run and play while approaching the sound barrier, constant raiding of the pantry, leaving trails of there whereabouts behind them and avoiding homework at all costs.

How big do weasels get ~ With the help of blogging and spending way to much time avoiding the gym I have an ongoing experiment on this topic.  Preliminary results are pointing to a growth rate of 10-15 lbs per year for adults.

I love my readers, but some of ya'll are creepy.

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Wednesday, August 18, 2010

I Hate Teachers!

Now before you all go getting your bloomers in a tizzy, hear me out.  I appreciate teachers and the difficult job that they do.  Heck, some of my best friends are teachers, but when it comes to back to school supply lists I have a hatred that burns from deep within my soul and it's because teachers are riding their beginning of the school year power ponies.

For the benefit of those of you sitting in the back of class doodling on your World of Weasels notebooks right now;  the smart kids have already figured this part out, Yes, I have just returned from school supply shopping.  Three hours, $192.00 and an eye twitch later I am only finished with 3/4 of my lists.

"Gee WeaselMomma, that sounds extreme!", I can hear you saying now.  Yes, it is extreme because the lists are so outrageously specific that it's a scavenger hunt to find what is required, at best.  At worst, it's a wild goose chase. 

This Weasel needs 2 boxes of 24 CRAYOLA - NON-WASHABLE crayons, that Weasel must have 1 box of 24 CRAYOLA - WASHABLE crayons!  Well, guess what?  Roseart was on sale and when I have to buy 15 boxes of crayons in total, I'm buying whatever brand is the best deal.  I'm also not about to go cross-eyed determining the specifics of the washability standard of any crayon.

And what's up with all the glue sticks?  10 glue sticks (+ 2 bottles) of ELMERS for 1 st grade?  8 sticks for 5th grade?  My kids can't even eat that much glue in one year, let alone use it all.  If the teacher is looking to self medicate through the school day by sniffing glue, she's got the wrong kind.  Once again, I'm going with whatever brand is the cheapest.  This junk adds up.

One ruler (inches and centimeters) as opposed to what?   Now, I know that the teachers are just mocking me. Then they often go on to specify wood or plastic.  Seriously people?

Scissors are always a fun hunt.  Fiskars 7", blunt tip for this grade, pointed tip for that grade.  I swear that the pointed tip ones are no pointier than a butter knife anyway.  Damn good thing I already have that inches and centimeters ruler in my cart.  Hey, check this out, store brand 2 pack of scissors complete with poke your own eye out feature for 79¢!  Guess what went in my cart?

5th graders need to have a compass, but can only have blunt tipped scissors.  Someone needs to learn how to do the math here and it's not me.

6 spiral notebooks & 6, 3-hole solid color, 2 pocket folders (each in purple, blue, red, orange, yellow and green).  Can't you just say 6 spiral notebooks in assorted colors with matching folders?  I am not about to traipse all over the city to find the elusive purple and BTW, there are no such thing as solid color 3-hole, 2 pocket folders.  Where do these teachers shop, fairyland?  These things must be right down the aisle from unicorns.  I bought a truckload of the 15¢ variety to satisfy the folder need through the course of the year.

The store was all out pink erasers and pencil cap erasers, but the 10 dozen pencils I had to buy and must sharpen and hand to children who may not have pointy scissors luckily come equipped with an eraser from the start! Whouda thunk it?

I swear that teachers do this to entertain themselves at the end of the summer.  They grab a pitcher of umbrella drinks, set up a lawn chair in aisle 3 and have fun watching parents walk the aisles of back to school shopping mart in zombie, twitchy, mouth breather mode, while they laugh to themselves much like I do when I send the Weasels in search of the candy that I 'misplaced' somewhere in the house, just so that I can get a few minutes of peace.

Yes, I understand that individual teachers like to organize their class in their own special way, but as a mother I have to organize my family in the most cost effective, time efficient and practical way and no, our school doesn't offer that nifty little school supply pack.

Now I have never had a teacher ever say one word to me about my substitutions of their supply list, but then again, maybe they already know that I am liable to blow at any given time.  The problem comes when the Weasels cry and fret that they don't have the right supplies and believe that they will get in trouble at school because of it.  I have to do the best I can to stick to the list without reaching poverty or loss of sanity.

Now if you'll excuse me, I still have to go find post it notes in yellow, green, orange and blue.

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Whatever Wednesday

I can't get my two active brain cells to work in conjunction with each other long enough to actually write a full blown article, so I'm just going to hit you with some bullet points of what's been swirling around in my mind.

  • School starts today for Eldest Weasel, next week for the rest of the gang.  This bums me out.  I love summer and having the Weasels home.  This summer went by at the speed of light.

  • I still need to chase down school supplies, clothing and shoes for the gang.  That adds up to parting with massive amounts of cash.

  • We are running very low on toilet paper.  It is imperative that I get to the store early this morning.

  • The rate with which the Weasels tear through toilet paper leads me to believe that they are constructing and escape rope from it.  Maybe I should find and use that escape rope myself.

  • I have been applying for positions waiting tables/ bartending at some of the local family establishments that I'm very familiar with, to no avail so far.  A fellow patron/friend pointed out that they can't afford to hire me, because I was on the other side of the bar their sales would tank.  With friends like mine, who needs hemorrhoids?  I made him buy the next round.

  • The developers of the ground zero mosque are lacking basic human decency.  Even if they legally have the right to build there, they are obviously lying about their motives for building 560 ft from ground zero.  They originally claimed that their intention was to honor the victims of September 11th and their families.  Yet, when those families are outraged, offended and outspoken about their disdain for this project, along with much of the country.  Even after having been offered numerous incentives to change location and with the knowledge that they are causing people anger and pain, these people push forward with the project.  That equates to a lack of scruples, basic human decency and honesty in my book. 

  • This Friday will be the next episode of Suburban Wow, with special guest co-host Dawn Meehan of Because I said so.  Tune in, as Dawn is highly entertaining and oodles of fun.  She's had a crazy week and will be able to keep us all in stitches.

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Tuesday, August 17, 2010

It's All About the U.S.A.

I have an awfully busy day ahead of me, so today I am posting for you a You Tube that was made by the daughter of a long time friend.  She wrote the lyrics and the music herself and also performs the song.  I thought it was mighty inventive and cool, so here goes.

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Monday, August 16, 2010

Dancing With a Pole

I've written before about the Weasels being a mixed family.  That is, I myself being Irish and Mr. Weasel being Polish.  We have a lot of fun when teasing each other about our respective heritage and families.  There is always much laughter to be found in Weaselville.  Well usually there is.

Just two short years since Mr. W's last layoff, we've learned that it has happened again.  This is a mixed bag of both good and bad news.  In the past year and half, Mr. W has been working 80+ hour weeks, full time contracting for a company and full time starting his own business to help secure a better future for the kids and I.  Granted, it is his day job contracting that brings home the scratch and things have been tight around here, but Mr. W has been burning the candle at both ends and could seriously use a break.  Not to mention that I miss him when he works such long hours. 

I'm going to have to find a day job myself.  Having been a SAHM for 17 years, my qualifications are a little lacking and rusty.  That and the only letters/title that I managed to achieve in college was my MRS.  So, I'm trying to think about the kind of job that would be the best fit for me and my qualifications.

Nobody seems to be searching for a resident smart ass.

Oprah's people have yet to contact me about becoming her replacement.

I haven't been offered any cash advances to write a book, yet.

After 6 kids, I'm no longer qualified not that I ever was to be an entertainer at a gentleman's club.  Nor would I want to be.  Without health insurance how would I get the penicillin and tetanus shots necessary to touch any surface in such places.

I'm still weighing my options and in the mean time instead of dancing on a pole, I think I will take some time to appreciate dancing in the kitchen with a Pole.

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Thursday, August 12, 2010

Weasels of Walmart

It's not often that I shop at Walmart.  It's not that I have anything against the place.  As a matter of fact, I think that it can be a very entertaining place to shop.  It's just not convenient for me to shop there and they should have a PG 13 warning or a 'Do not look directly at any full moons for risk of blindness and/or mental scaring' on the door.

For whatever reason, this morning I was reminded of a particular shopping expedition to Walmart that embarked on with the Weasels once upon a time.

Picture it.  A 2nd grader, a preschooler, a toddler and a hungry infant.  Now add 1 tired and frazzled mom dressed for the occasion, a long grocery list, lots of nagging and begging. Now toss in 6 little hands touching every nasty little public surface that they can and stir.

This was the scene as I was being bombarded with "can I have this?", "Mom, how many sides does a ball have?" and my personal favorite "Mom, what did Boy Weasel just step in?".  My only focus was filling my cart with the necessities of life and getting the heck back home where I could put them all for naps and my feet up with a strong drink control the chaos a little better.

As I pushed through the store with my list, Eldest Weasel wiggled the soon to be gold mine in her mouth known as a loose tooth.  Yes, with her hands that had been touching every germ and gunk infested surface in the store.  "Mom, when will my tooth fall out?  When will my tooth fall out?  When will my tooth fall out?".

My reply, timed perfectly as a seasoned couple passed by us in the aisle, with that look of Wow, you never know what you will see at Walmart!  on their faces.  "The very next time you back talk me, honey."

The couple burst out in laughter and I just kept moving.

Yes, we are the Weasels of Walmart.  I'm just glad I wound up on my own site and not this one.

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Tuesday, August 10, 2010

We Have A Winner!

The winner of the Family Trip for 5 to CLEVELAND is:

Drum roll please:

Congratulations!  I hope you have a wonderful time and stop by Chicago to visit on your way to see me)! 

All the Best,

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Thursday, August 5, 2010

Christmas In August? ~ Cleveland Rocks pt IV

Catch up on part I
Catch up on part II
Catch up on part III

Last Wednesday was definitely chuck full Cleveland-y goodness and fun.  Our tour group ran around from morning until night enjoying just a small fraction of what this city has to offer.  After hanging out in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame our next stop would be the house from A Christmas Story.  I love that movie and it is definitely a Christmas tradition enjoyed in Weaselville.  I always watch the looping marathon while wrapping gifts on Christmas Eve.

I had so much fun listening to the brief history of how the house became a museum and then getting to run around and play inside.   Oh yes, Weasels love to play!

I got to hide under the sink.
Played in Ralphie and Randy's bedroom.

Hanging out with 'Randy' himself was a Major Award!
Yup. Ian Petrella, who played Randy in the movie, just happened to be at the house on a promotional tour and was gracious enough to chat and pose for pics.  That was cool.  I managed to only spend about a bajillian dollars in the gift shop that was full of fun novelties to have, like a leg lamp cookie cutter and other Weasel must haves. They have an online store too.

From there we headed to one of my favorite places,  I forgot how much I miss living in Cleveland. The Cleveland The Metroparks Zoo.  It really is a world class zoo with viewing exhibits that bring you very close to the animals, while keeping life comfortable for them.  There is a new Elephant exhibit opening in May 2011 that will be one of, if not the, world's finest.  They have a one of a kind indoor rain forest and starting just this summer and running through Labor Day, you can interact directly with the animals by HAND FEEDING THE GIRAFFES!
This is my buddy Travis.
This was an incredible and mind blowing experience.  They were so gentle and sweet while almost acting like puppies seeking attention and affection.  This is an absolute must do.  I will never forget it and can't wait for the chance to go back and do it again.

We did so much cool stuff in Cleveland that I can't even fit it into four posts!  The last thing that I will tell you about the absolute awesomeness that it Cleveland is Wednesday evening our group had a chance to enjoy the nightlife of 4th street in Downtown.  Serendipity struck and the next thing I know I was hanging out and having drinks with the drummer for Ted Nugent, Mick Brown.
Mick, Myself and the Waiters Thumb
Okay, so now that you have enjoyed Cleveland with me, how would you like to enjoy it with your family?????  Through the awesomeness that is WeaselMomma the fantabulous sponsors of this giveaway, I am giving away a 4 Day/3 Night vacation for 5 to Cleveland!!!!!!  All  prizes have been furnished by the individual attractions.

To enter, simply answer these quiz questions from this four part series correctly.  One comment with the answers and your contact email is all that is needed to be entered into the random drawing.
  • If you want to tweet, that's sweet - Do It!  
  • If you want to follow me or subscribe to my RSS feed, I'd love you for it.If you want to follow me on twitter, I'm @WeaselMomma and I try not to disappoint.
  • None of these are necessary, but all are appreciated.
  • Giveaway ends Sunday at midnight CDT
Here's the quiz:
  1. Where is my hometown of my grown-up years?
  2. Why do I love thrill rides?
  3. What is the name of the biggest audiophile I've ever met?
  4. What's my giraffe buddy's name?
  5. What makes WeaselMomma so awesome?  In 500 words or less.  (If I'm not making you jump through hoops for entries, I'm allowed to have some fun with you, right?)
*My trip was sponsored by Cedar point, Positively Cleveland, the Toledo Zoo & the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.  However, all words and opinions expressed here are my own, cause that's how I roll and what my readers deserve.Stumble Upon Toolbar

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Wednesday, August 4, 2010

The End Is Near!

My Cleveland Rocks series will resume tomorrow.  You don't want to miss it.

The pressure of 80+ hour work weeks for the past year and a half seems to be taking it's toll on Mr. Weasel.  Any of you who have been reading here for a while know how much I love the Mr. and that I would never, ever, disparage him on the Internet.  However, Eldest Weasel(16) and I think that this is too funny not to share.

For a while now, Mr. Weasel has been speculating about the collapse of our society being on the horizon, thanks to high taxes during a massive recession, unsustainable debt and spending by the government.

Now I agree that these are all very detrimental things that need to be righted before things in this country get worse, but I don't see the collapse of local law enforcement, food shortages or loss of access to clean water lingering just around the corner.

The other day, being the darling man that he is, Mr. Weasel did the grocery shopping to replenish the pantry and fridge that the locusts Weasels managed to empty while I was in Cleveland.  While unpacking the bags, I came across some rather strange purchases for the Weasel household.

That's right, Canned Whole Chicken, Canned Beef Stew, Canned Chunk Chicken and Canned Chicken and DumplingsThere were also 4 cans of beef ravioli, but to Mr. Weasels dismay, the Weasels ate those. They were the only part of this purchase that any Weasels would ever even consider eating.

Me:  What's all this?
Mr. W:  I'm stocking up on canned goods to prepare for the collapse of civilization!
Me: ???????? (complete with look of concern for Mr. W's mental health.  Besides, I'd sooner eat the dog than Canned Whole Chicken.)
Mr. W:  I'm going to buy a few cans each paycheck so that we have a one month stock of food when everything collapses!  (In the happily excited vernacular of a 10 year old who is telling of his plan to build a rocket ship in the backyard.)

I tried not to laugh although nothing could hide the amused smirk I was now wearing, but that plan was blown out of the water immediately upon making eye contact with Eldest Weasel, who was having the same types of thoughts that I was.

Me:  So, where do you plan on storing all of this food stock, the bomb shelter?
Mr. W:  I'm not going to share with you when the time comes.

In the mean time, Eldest and I have a regular running joke going about Canned Chicken.  Eldest has asked me, "Mom, why don't you stop him?  He's nuts!".  My answer, "Dad's happy, it's harmless and I get a blog post and a few laughs out of the deal".

Mr. Weasel mildly protested about me posting this.  Not because he is embarrassed by it, but he doesn't want you all breaking down my door when society collapses because you know where the canned food stockpile is. This is the first time I have over ruled such a request, but I do request that you refrain from assaulting my super secret undisclosed location when the time comes.

*Come back tomorrow for Part IV of Cleveland Rocks, complete with a fantasmic, giveaway.

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Tuesday, August 3, 2010

The Heart of Rock-n-Roll is Beating, in Cleveland ~ Cleveland Rocks pt. III

Catch up on part I
Catch up on part II

After a long bus ride and fantastic roller coaster fun, it was finally time to finish the last one hour leg of our trek to Downtown Cleveland.   As a group, we were exhausted and all funned- out for the day.

It would be close to midnight before we reached the hotel and I had been silently grumbling to myself and dreading the check in process for an entire tour group before I could throw myself onto my pillow.  The Crowne Plaza Cleveland City Center knew we would be arriving late and tired.  Low and behold, I could have kissed the manager full on the lips, when he anticipated our needs by meeting the bus out in front of the lobby, with our room keys in hand, having already pre-checked us in.  This is about the kindest service he could have provided.

My room was beautiful, clean, spacious, and full of wonderfully luxurious amenities from a welcome letter and a box of chocolates from a local confectioner to a sleep mask and information about the hours the hospitality room would be  serving a continental breakfast.  It was just what this weary traveler ordered.

All of the employees were friendly and helpful in a very genuine way.  Then again, that's what I know Clevelanders to be.  It really is a city of lovely and courteous people.  Case in point, I went outside in the pitch darkness of 5 am to have my morning cigarette.  The streets were mostly empty and I was still groggy while enjoying my first cup of coffee and my morning smoke.  A casually dressed young black man, listening to his iPod and walking to work, greeted me with a "Good morning, how are you today?" as he passed by.  Of course I responded in kind, but I was a little surprised.  In Chicago, people use there phones and iPods to avoid making eye contact or any other kind of human contact for that matter.  I only mention that the young man was black, because of the volume it speaks about race relations in Cleveland.  I shouldn't have been surprised by this common courtesy.  It seems like 12 years in Chicago has jaded me against home town values and how much the little things mean.

Wednesday was another full day.  They sure do know how to pack a schedule on these trips.  We started off at the West Side Market, the largest indoor/outdoor market in the country.  It is filled with butcher counters, patisseries, produce stands, coffee roasters and cheese shops that the people of Cleveland love to shop.  I only wish I had a travel cooler so I could have stocked up.

Next we were onto the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.  I wasn't that excited about this stop, being that I'm not a big music buff, but all that changed thanks to Andy Kenen.  Andy is a retired school teacher who has volunteered as a docent at the Hall for the past 17 years.  The Hall and museum had thousands of pieces of memorabilia that I recognized and thousands that I did not.  Andy however, brought all of these pieces to life with the most amazing stories behind all of them.  Andy is the biggest audiophile that I have ever met, by far and had me captivated with the history of the memorabilia, his knowledge  of everything in the the building and his story telling ability, like a small child begging for 'just one more chapter, please'.  I came out of the Hall of Fame already planning my next trip back.  Thanks Andy.  I only wish I had had you as one of my teachers once upon a time.

Stay tuned for part IV of Cleveland Rocks for a giveaway that will blow your minds.  Besides, Wednesday's excursions aren't even over yet.

*My trip was sponsored by Cedar point, Positively Cleveland, the Toledo Zoo & the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.  However, all words and opinions expressed here are my own, cause that's how I roll and what my readers deserve.Stumble Upon Toolbar

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Sunday, August 1, 2010

Cleveland Rocks pt. ll ~ Get To The Point Already!

To read pt. 1 of the Cleveland Rocks series, click here.

It's no secret to any of my regular readers that I love Cedar Point* and for good reason.  It has been voted "Best Amusement Park in the World" 9 years in a row thanks to 75 rides, including 17 roller coasters.  It's a thrill seekers dream park.  The world class coasters of CP are some of the best I have ever experienced.  Whether it's the Top Thrill Dragster, the Maverick, Millennium Force or others, your adrenaline will get pumping.

Many of you are thinking, 'WeaselMomma, you're Nuts! With 5 kids why would you even be interested in more adventure in your life? You already have enough heart pounding chaos on a daily basis to jump start Frankenstein's Monster'.  To that I say, You're right, I am nuts, but I sure do like to have fun!

For those of you who aren't thrill seekers or have younger and less adventurous children, I have good news for you too.  CP is well planned out to be family friendly with 4 different ride areas for the younger crowd dispersed throughout the park and intermediate family rides sprinkled among the top thrill rides.  So, you won't get stuck at the front of the park in 'Baby Ride Land'  as my way too adventurous for her own good 6 year old sneers about it while she rolls her eyes, all day long.

Also, the park is located right on the coast of Lake Erie and offers direct beach access to the warmest of the Great Lakes.  Some of your family wants the thrill rides, some of them just want to chill and splash?  Yeah, WeaselMomma has got your back.

Oh, what's that?  You don't want sand, wah, wah, wah??????  Well, I have you covered their too.  The Hotel Breakers, conveniently located adjacent to the park and beach access also has a beautiful pool, complete with a bar for you lushy types.  It's a gorgeous hotel built in 1905, that through years has held onto its early 20th century charm while still keeping up with the modern world offerings, such as wi-fi.

Oh, now you think you can stump me with 'What if I want thrills mixed with sun and splashing?"  Yes, I can read your mind.  Smart Alec.  You can't stump me that easily!  For you, I offer the Cedar Point Soak City Water Park!  Yup, acre upon acre of wet thrills and fun.  You thought you had me there!

Starting September 17 and running through Halloween, CP is open Friday, Saturday and Sunday for HalloWeekends.  Four haunted houses, five spooked out nighttime attractions, daytime fun and a parade for the little ones and Halloween thrills for all.  I've never experienced this event, but am hoping to enjoy it along with the beach and hotel, this year with my family so that I can come back and tell you all about it.  It sounds great and I am betting that the Weasels will completely melt down.  lynch WeaselMomma be very disappointed if we don't, as they themselves are big fans of the park and have been begging for Halloweekends ever since they read about it online.  Needless to say, they know that I am a sucker for the Point.

Just to throw some whipped cream and cherries on top for you, CP is clean and very well maintained.  Everything from the walkways to the restrooms are lovingly cared for, making it a genuinely family friendly experience.  Located about an hour west of Cleveland, in Sandusky, OH, it's only a 5 hour drive from the Chicago area and an ever shorter trek from Columbus or Pittsburgh.  Basically, it's a one tank trip from the mid~Atlantic states and much of the Midwest.

Just remember, WeaselMomma is definitely your go-to person on all things Cedar Point.  Now just get to the Point already!

 ** Stay tuned for the entire Cleveland Rocks series for a chance at winning a fantabulous giveaway that I'm not announcing yet.  Trust me, it's Fantasmic even!

*My trip was sponsored by Cedar point, Positively Cleveland, the Toledo Zoo & the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.  However, all words and opinions expressed here are my own, cause that's how I roll and what my readers deserve.

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