Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Safety First

*This is a re-posting from October of 2008. Those of you that enjoyed it, can do so again. To those of you that haven't seen it, well it's new to you!*
*editors note ~ the orb light above the kids I can't offer explanation for*

We all have heard about the dangers encircling kids while Trick or Treating. Authorities from Pediatricians to to law enforcement to cheapskates have urged us to forgo the ritual of trick or treat in favor of a neighborhood party for the children. All in the name of sucking the fun out of Halloween urban legend the supposed safety of our children. So as my contribution to public awareness of safety precaution procedures I will share with you how we in Weaselville protect our children from possible harm on All Hallow's Eve.

Step one ~ One parent goes trick or treating with the kids. Around here Mr. Weasel takes the Weasels and a travel mug of 'something to keep Daddy warm', and heads off through the neighborhood. By sticking to houses that we know, we keep the kids safe and he ensures his mug gets refilled along his trek.

Step two ~ One parent stays home to hand out candy. I dress up pseudo menacingly(a hooded cape, some really pale make-up, dark shading under the eyes), set up the fire-pit in the driveway handing out candy and smiles to the wee little ones, jello shots to their parents(they deserve to get treats too) and giving the older kids a perfect Halloween scare. It's great and they love it! All you have to do to freak the older kids out is........ nothing. Just stare and don't speak. Slowly walk toward them with candy in hand while keeping your stare. Even the teens get creeped out. Some just walk away and say no thanks. This keeps your house from getting egged from lack of candy and means leftover candy for you.

Step three ~ No candy is to be consumed by children until it has been thoroughly inspected by the parents. Mr. Weasel and I always sort through the candy immediately after the trick or treating is done. We set aside anything that looks delicious suspicious. Paying special attention to any candy combining both chocolate and peanut butter.

Step four ~ Do not alert authorities unnecessarily. Before calling the authorities about any suspicious candy, you must first make sure that it is not a false alarm. The best way to do this is to test the candy yourself. If you eat each and every piece of delicious suspicious candy and don't die(other than from gluttony) there is no reason to alert law enforcement. You may have to throw yourself on top of that grenade, but the kids' safety is worth it.

Step five ~ give the candy a second inspection after the children go to bed. You can never be too careful.

I hope you found this helpful and informative.

****Wishing you all a Safe, Happy and Spooky Halloween!****

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Eric said...

It's the candy part that makes me miss celebrating Halloween.

So I just stick to visiting people's desk at work an plundering their candy jars..

PJ Mullen said...

I believe this would be one of the true benefits of parenting, you know, if I weren't diabetic. That totally ruined Halloween for me during my son's toddler years. If I knew more of my neighbors I'd totally make some creepy jello shots. Or, maybe, I'll do it to get to know my neighbors better.

WeaselMomma said...

@ Eric ~ It's all about the candy and spooky fun.

@ PJ ~ If it helps you out, I will gladly inspect you sons loot!

Tom said...

Every year here we end up with some suspicious candy. It's the darndest thing; it's always the kit-kats, snickers and reese's that have to be confiscated from the kid's haul. Darned neighbors, handing out unsafe candy like that. I hope there's more this year. Have fun!

BellaDaddy said...

Love this...thanks so much for posting!

surprised mom said...

The oldest is at college and I don't thing the youngest is going trick or treating. There goes my suspicious candy! Maybe I'll go over to my sister's house where my niece and nephew are younger and probably will have lots of suspicious candy!

Have a great Halloween! Boo!

DysFUNctional Mom said...

Oh, the sacrifices we make for the good of our children.

WeaselMomma said...

@ Tom ~ You can not be to safe.

@ Bella Daddy ~ Thanks for coming by, glad you had fun.

@ Surprised ~ Definitely offer assistance to inspect you sisters kids candy.

@ Dysfunctional ~ It what us moms are willing to do for our kids.

Cheffie-Mom said...

Happy Halloween!! And I have some photos with unexplainable orbs, too -- very strange.....

Me said...

*giggle* I imagine that my 2-year old is gonna have LOADS of *ahm* suspicious candy this year ;) Three cheers for my waistline!

Cute post. . .cute ghostly orb, too!

Jeve (aka John and Steve) said...

Very informative!

Michelle said...

We go through the same steps except that I go trick or treating. And we hit every house we can so that I can take the icky candy and recycle it for the 462 (my husband counted last year) kids who trick or treat at our house. And everything that's left gets donated to soldiers overseas. We so don't need the candy. That I don't like.

Scott said...

The reason I know there is a God is because there's no way that man could have made such a divine flavor such as chocolate and peanut butter without some heavenly inspiration..... I mean, I agree completely with step 3

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