Don't You Wish Your Wife Was As Sweet As Me?

Mr. Weasel does not like fly. He has gotten better over time, but back in the day, he was the guy white- knuckling the armrest and starting to hyperventilate because he was convinced that we were about to die.

I, being the kind, sweet, caring and devoted wife that I am, used to comfort him by rolling my eyes and comparing him in my mind to a two year old throwing a temper tantrum and holding their breath over a tootsie roll incident turned bad.. Yes, he's a lucky man.

Anyway, a few years back and by a few, I mean 13. $hit, it's been that long? Mr. Weasel and I were on a romantic long weekend getaway in search of housing in a new city that we were not thrilled to be moving to. We flew in on Thursday and home on Sunday.

We had a plan to make the flight go smoothly for both of us because when I am not traveling with children, I don't want to be bothered with tethering people to their seats. We would arrive at the airport early, take Mr. W to the bar and give him just enough booze to put him for a nap as soon as we boarded the plane.

This having been pre 9/11, the flight crews were still fun and often enjoyable company. We were on an aircraft where some of the seats sat facing other travelers. Mr. W quickly fell asleep before we even taxied. Luckily, my other seat mates proved to be a fun and social bunch and we were seated adjacent to the flight attendant, who was all about making her work day a good time.

We all had a good chuckle together as the Mr.'s adversity to flying was obvious to all in the way he gripped his armrest and talked in his sleep. By the end of the flight, we were in stitches.

When the time came for landing preparation seat backs, tray tables, you know the drill, I knew I had to wake Mr. Weasel, but I was ready to have some fun with it. I asked the flight attendant to pass me the oxygen mask that they use for the pre-flight demonstration. She laughed herself 1/2 silly and handed it to me.

"Honey! Honey! Wake up and put this on!! Quick, We're going Down!!!!!!"

He woke up alright. Screaming like a little girl. Thank God for seat belts. We were all laughing so hard that they were the only things keeping us safely secured in our seats.

Mr. Weasel still hasn't stopped cursing me over that one.

Lesson for the day: 1. Take every Chance you can to get away alone as a couple. 2.It's important to always pack your sense of humor.

Great Moments in Fatherhood

Father's Day Post are a dime a dozen today, an rightfully so, but I'm hoping to share a little funny with you that might be worth a nickel.

First of all, Happy Father's Day to all of you Dad's out there. The role that you play in all of our lives is an important one and you have some big shoes to fill.

Secondly, some back round; Mr. Weasel is a great Dad and spouse. He has always been a hard worker and his day doesn't end when he comes home from work. From day one, he has been an involved and hands on parent from diaper changing to sporting events and homework. He laughs and plays with the kids (and me), disciplines and guides them in life. He fills his shoes well.

No matter, we all have our moments when things don't come out of your mouth as you had intended. Things that sounded one way in our heads, don't always translate into the open air the way we thought they would. This happened to Mr. W. last weekend and I'm still laughing about it.

With Eldest Weasel having the new found freedom of driving along with the autonomy and independence that go hand in hand with the privilege, the Mr. and I decided to have a sit down with her and reiterate good decision making and the impact that her decisions can have on her life. We covered everything from what parties to stay at and what ones to leave immediately because trouble is brewing.

We have always taught the kids chastity in their lives, but know that we can not control their actions and they will make their own decisions. We just hope they don't choose poorly.

We covered with Eldest the importance of choosing the right guys to date and ditching the wrong ones.

Me: Never date anyone that doesn't treat you with constant respect. You deserve it and should never settle for less. You see the way that Dad treats me and the small little things he does everyday, i.e. making the morning coffee, to show love and caring. You see the way that Dad talks to me and jokes with me. That is the way you deserve to be treated too.

Mr. W: Yeah, make sure he is the kind of guy that will make you coffee in the morning!

Of course my jaw dropped. Mr. Weasel had not even caught what he had said and Eldest never let on that she even noticed his misstep. I excused Eldest and burst out laughing. I commented to Mr. Weasel that he forgot to tell her that she should always ask for cab fare home too! Mr. Weasel flushed with embarrassment at his gaff and shouted to Eldest, "Coffee after you are married!".

Well, that's my funny for the day. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did.

Happy Father's Day and I hope you have a day filled with many more laughs.

I Want

I want to bake you a cake and make your favorite dinner.

I want to hug you and hold you and give you 8 birthday kisses.

I want to see how you've grown.

I want to watch you open the perfect present and see your face light up.

I want to see your smile and hear your laugh.

I know that you are having a better party than I could ever throw you.

I know that the gifts you have bring you much more happiness than anything I could ever offer.

I want you to have a happy birthday and most of all to know how much Mommy and Daddy love you.

I miss you so much.

*Clarification for those of you new to World of Weasels - Our Claire, aka, Angel Weasel, passed away on July 2, 2002. Today would be her 8th birthday.

Weird Dream Or Not?

I'm not sleeping. This is nothing all that out of the ordinary here in Weaselville. I am usually awake well before dawn, but I am also usually asleep earlier than most. It all evens out. Even if my sleep patterns are not the norm, I do manage to get by and still be pretty stinking functional for the most part on the few hours that I do get.

The past few days I am getting much less REM time than usual. Although I have gone to bed on time, I am waking up around 1 am to start my day. I am waking because of extremely odd and disturbing dreams about what would be considered mundane topics. To jolt awake in a cold sweat, bolting upright, over not getting hash browns with an extremely early morning fast food breakfast and finding that the wrapper had been filled with a very fatty, deep fried and delicious New York Strip steak in it's stead and that I didn't have the early bird coffee special, even though it was in my hand and I was drinking it as I came to this realization in my dream, caused me a huge level of anxiety. Enough to startle me awake to start my day and make me fearful of closing my eyes.

In reality, I have had deep fried New York Strips. They are spectacular and voted most likely to make your heart stop! That would be a bonus in any meal I were to be served. Why would it cause me such anxiety?

I have self analyzed this wacky dream and my insane reaction to something to so seemingly sublime. Here it goes.

I didn't get what I had expected. I went to a trusty source of consistency we all know exactly what's on the menu and what it will taste like at fast food joints placed my order and got something better than I had asked for. It did have it's extra fat to bite through, but the sweetness of the meat is well worth having to chew through it.

The coffee I had in my hand, it was sweet, creamy and special. I was drinking in it in and enjoying every sip. All of a sudden it was gone. I no longer had it to enjoy, even though it was mine. It was gone and I didn't understand how or why something so delicious was gone without explanation. Taken away from me in the blink of an eye.

This still won't make any sense to most of you, but bare with me if you can. It makes more sense in context. This coming Friday would be the 8th birthday of that sweet little Angel Weasel you see in my header. She was born with special needs, Down's Syndrome to be exact, (To us she was New York Strip). She passed away at home suddenly, in the middle of the night a few weeks later, while I slept. Her creamy skin and sweetness were in my arms, yet she was gone (anybody get the coffee connection?). She had been special and I didn't have her anymore, even as I held her.

I fear sleep when no one else is up and on watch over the nest. I wake early to take up vigil. I fault myself with having missed her last few hours of life because I wanted sleep. I wish I had drank more in.

Now that I have depressed the living daylights out of you, I want you to think of this the next time you are awake in the middle of the night with a crying baby, a sick toddler, changing the peed sheets of a bunk bed or lecturing an obstinate teenager and be grateful that you are.

You don't Want To Miss A Thing.

What a Week!

Here's your reminder that Suburban Wow airs today an Noon Eastern/11 cdt/9 Pacific. Click this link to join Melisa and I for an hours worth of fun. Today's topics to include Picking on Me, Melisa gloating about the Blackhawks and teenage driving adventures. Bring a friend and send a tweet.

Today I am going with some Fatherhood Friday Fragments and covering all my bases.

• Watching the Stanley Cup Finals with the Weasels, as I wrote about before, brought back so many memories of my childhood and the bonding that occurred while watching the Flyers with my Dad. Unfortunately, it was a little too de ja vous, as I watched the Flyers lose the finals in game 6. C'est La Vie.

• Congrats to the Stanley Cup Champion Chicago Blackhawks. They won fair and square. They worked hard, played well and earned it. I tip my hat to them.

• Finally, after 2 weeks of dealing with government agencies - I'll elaborate on Suburban Wow - Eldest Weasel is now a licensed driver. As Melisa has taught me, Oy Vey.

• I took Eldest Weasel to lunch next door to the DMV at a brand new Chinese restaurant to celebrate with $5 lunch specials. The neighborhood itself is heavily Mexican in ethnicity and all of the employees were Mexican. The real surprise though, came in the beautifully authentic looking food, that when tasted, oddly tasted like Mexican food. The seasonings and flavor mixes were definitely not Chinese. It wasn't bad, just different. I'm calling it Mexi-Chin Cuisine.

That's all from me for now, tune into Suburban Wow for more and don't forget to hit up Dad-Blogs for some good postings on everything Fatherhood and Mrs.4444 some wonderful Friday Fragments!