Thursday, February 26, 2009

Baby Steps

Fatherhood Friday
Today is FatherHood Friday over on dad-blogs. If you haven't yet joined dad-blogs, go do so here. It's a great community forum of Dad Bloggers, and a few Moms too. There are some great articles to educate, entertain and provoke conversation.

I am obviously not a father. I did however, have a father and am married to a man who is a father. So, I too have enough experience to speak about Fatherhood, from a viewpoint of Mom and Daughter.

As with Motherhood, Fatherhood is not not something that you are born knowing how to to do. Some parts of it come naturally, like the love you feel for your offspring. Other aspects, are things that you learn on the fly along the way. Mistakes are bound to be made and it is in learning from those mistakes and rectifying the aftermath of them that you grow into becoming a good father.

Let me give you an example of how Mr. Weasel grew and learned in the early weeks of fatherhood.

Our Eldest was only about 10 weeks old. We both loved her dearly. I was her main caretaker as a nursing SAHM. Mr. Weasel was involved mainly with cuddle duty, and lots of it there was. He would help in all areas that he could, like sterilizing pacifiers, going out to buy diapers, occasionally changing them and helping out at bath time. I took the bulk of hands on baby needs like feeding, diapers and dressing.

One weekend, friends of ours came to stay with us and visit. A great couple who had yet to jump off the cliff of parenthood. Saturday morning I took the opportunity to enjoy a long hot shower while I had 3 other seemingly competent adults to care for my baby girl while I indulged in this special treat. Over the past few weeks, all of my showers had been extremely rushed, as Eldest would cry the second I started running the water.

I had only been enjoying the steamy hot water running over my tired back for about 2 minutes when I heard a blood curdling scream from the living room. Within 10 seconds the bathroom door came flying open and Mr. Weasel jumps into My shower fully clothed and screaming as he pushed his way under the shower head.

As soon as he is able to speak, he yells "she shit on me!!!!!! I was changing her diaper on the couch and she shit on me!!!!! It's all over everywhere!!!!". "Where is she?" is my first question. "She's still on the couch". "You left her on the couch? To roll off and fall??????" was all I could care about.

I grabbed my robe and rushed to the living room, where I find our dear friends had finished diapering her and picked her up to safety. I found 1 tiny tiny smudge of baby poo on the blanket that she had been laying on for her diaper change. Furious, I storm back into the bathroom to rant at Mr. Weasel for taking care of himself before his daughter, leaving her endangered on the couch and taking away my one small luxury of a hot peaceful shower.

Once he had the opportunity to reevaluate his actions, via his wife and the mother of his child spelling out for him everything he had done wrong (I'm helpful like that) in no uncertain terms. Mr. Weasel realized the errors of his ways and how he should handle this situation differently in the future.

This was both a learning and growing experience for him as a father. I can't say that I never had another shower that was abruptly interrupted, but it was never again with this circumstance.
From then on, he brought poop laden child to hand to me in the shower.

Baby steps.

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30 comments:

Daddy Files said...

I screamed like a little girl with a skinned knee the first time I was pooped on. Even though I wanted to run from the room, I held it together long enough to finish the diaper change and pass him off to mom before I began scrubbing my hands like Jack Nicholson in As Good As It Gets.

Joeprah said...

LMAO! That is bush league. Getting shit on literally is to be expected--I mean seriously. I can't believe he charged in the shower like that--too funny.

Tara R. said...

Bwahahah! That is priceless... and I dare say every mom has a similar story.

New-Dad-Blog said...

I just recently been shat on. . .Stayed tuned to my blog for that gem of a story.

I feel your pain Mr. Weasel!

Isabella said...

LOL. Great post. :)

It's funny to look back and compare the then and now.

Then: my husband screeches from the other room that the baby got poop all over and he needs HELP. RIGHT. NOW.

Now: After I mosey into the baby's room to see what's keeping them, the husband glances over and says "hey, can you watch her while I get this poop off me? Oh, and what should we do for lunch?"

ShankRabbit said...

Oh man... classic! What a great story!

I remember the first time I got shit on. I had a similar feeling, although it ended up with me turning into a little 5 year old screaming, "Moooooooooooommmmm!"

PJ Mullen said...

I've easily changed 75% of my son's diapers since he was born and the poop never bothered me. What did bother me, however, was when he was maybe three weeks old and his little soldier misfired - right into my eye. At that point in our lives we both got up whenever he started crying and one would get him while the other prepared the changing materials. This time I laid down on the bed next to him (we were in our room and he was still in his basinette) to keep from rolling away when BAM, right in the eye. Wasn't the first time I was christened, but was easily the one that got me riled up!

seashore subjects said...

Good thing boy came 2nd, so there was some experience before introduction to the baby fountain!

ciara said...

so funny how wimpy dads get when they get shit on. lol

tara-only difference is we continue on diapering our babes, THEN we worry about cleaning ourselves. we also don't scream like a little girl, despite the fact that we are female. lol

the jumping in the shower fully clothed thing kills me lol

Tom said...

Your friends got a good lesson in what's ahead as well, so it wasn't all for nothing. That, and babies bounce pretty good.

Laura said...

I love it!!

I was blessed that hubby had tons of experience from his many, many nieces & nephews (the baby I carry will be the 26th grandchild on his side), but to this day he'll ask for "help with this mess" & I'll wonder aloud what he thinks I would do if he were at work or out of town??

Thanks for the great laugh!!!

Craig said...

Bring back the memories. I remember being blasted by one of our little ones. I was standing in front of our entertainment center and we found bits and pieces for months.

de-I said...

Learning to be a Father is like learning to ride a bramha bull.

terri said...

I love how you showed Mr. W the error of his ways. "I'm helpful like that.." I was helpful like that too!

Men are such wussies sometimes.

Geno said...

I remember being more startled than disgusted the first time I was pooped on. I just didn't expect it! Baby bums are like fully loaded cannons! No warning whatsoever!

Coincidentally, the first time I got pooped on was the first time I got peed on. Up until that moment, my reflexes were well tuned. I took my eye off of my son's appendage for one second to assess poop damage and WAMMO! Pee all over! I couldn't help but laugh out loud (did I mention it was 4am and I was delirious!?)

Mrs4444 said...

Can't say that I've ever had the pleasure of being shat upon, though I was peed on a couple of times by Kyle (before I learned to throw a cloth over him when changing him. What a great story :)

KWG said...

Hilarious. How long did it take him as a child to get potty trained?

;)

The poop and pee never bothered me in the beginning (and still doesn't).

My deal is the cutting of the nails. Scared to do it. Can't do it. Refuse to do it.

Don't ever ask me to do it. Please.

Mocha Dad said...

Baby poop is extremely toxic and hazardous to a dad's health. He reacted the way any dad would have.

dearmisterman said...

Too awesome! I still get it every now and again for putting my baby girl in the sink and using the spray nozzle to hose her down. I didn't interrupt Mommy, though.

peteej said...

Before kids, the idea of poo or slobber on me from some germ carrier was unheard of. After kids: When being puked on, I look at it and comment on what they had for lunch. I might clean it off before getting back to eating a sandwich.

Michelle said...

Oh I love it! Poor Dadddy ;)

I still can't believe I was never christened by Mister Man in all my diaper changing of him, but my husband was. Three times.

Glad you know when to give. There's only so much a man can learn at a time, right? Hopefully by the time you got to youngest is was old hat, right?

Bad Momma said...

LMAO. Baby steps. We always changed our boys in the bathroom. Didn't get pooped on but got peed on quite a bit.

nonnasnonsense said...

now that was freakin funny. i can almost picture him freakin out and running in there screaming. almost.

Bella Daddy said...

LMAO LMAO LMAO! Ah, the memories....Damn I got a good laugh (and deja vou) outta this one!

'cuz I'm the mommy, that's why! said...

Hubs is great with diapers "What's that on my hand? Oh, just poo". Just don't let it be baby barf (or my personal favorite, big-kid-can't-hit-the-garbage-pail barf).
Good times, good times...

Vodka Mom said...

omg. LOL!! I am going to NOT say anything that might offend any of the stupid dads out there. ALL of them.

Cheffie-Mom said...

ROFL! Great post. Memories are rushing back from when mine were in diapers. (:

Momo Fali said...

The first time my son projectile pooped I instinctively turned his body in one quick sweep, almost throwing him off the changing table in the process. And, he was my second child. Poop is scary.

texasholly said...

Ha! Loved it. I was the one who let my eldest get bounced off the couch about that age. I then had to call my hubby who is a doctor and tell him what I did while he screamed at me over the phone to NOT LET THE BABY SLEEP UNTIL HE GOT HOME TO EVALUATE HIM. Holy crap. That might have been a tad bit stressful.

Alls well that ends well. He is OK, a little grumpy, but fine - and I am referring to both my eldest and my husband.

Colleen - Mommy Always Wins said...

HA HA HA! Poor little girl!

I hope when your daughter shows signs of any mis-behavior you point out it could possibly be caused by the trauma she experienced on that long-ago day. ;-)

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