Sunday, February 1, 2009

Binging And Purging

Weasels aren't noted for our love of football. We have nothing against it, it's just not of big interest to us. There is one exception, that would be the Super Bowl. It's not so much the game itself, but the food and commercials that surround the game. The Weasels love that we prepare a little "Super Bowl Party" just for them. They love all kinds of snacks (that they get to eat in the living room) in lieu of traditional dinner.

With that in mind, yesterday, Smallest Weasel, Monkey, Mr. and Myself headed to a 'new to us' grocery store that I had heard many great things about. People rave over the deli, bakery and produce at Caputo's, so off we went.

Upon entering the store, Monkey Weasel(9) grabbed a big cart and Smallest Weasel (4) grabbed a kiddie cart. They had decided to plan the Super Bowl menu themselves. Right away they found the display of chips for the game and proceeded to empty it. We managed to put some back, telling them that 3 bags would be more than ample. On our right we discovered the bakery. This is where I had to be reigned in. They had cannoli. Fresh filled, homemade cannoli. I am in love with cannoli. I am a cannoli snob and will only eat fresh made fresh filled cannoli. Do not refrigerate, they get soggy. Fill and eat ASAP. This is a rare find and brings much joy to my life. If you don't know this joy, Go. Find. It. The man behind behind the counter found himself laughing at the childlike excitement in my eyes and the happy dance I was performing.

Next we moved onto the deli, where the sale prices on nice looking selections were incredible. As I took my number, Smallest Weasel was loading her mini cart with whole salamis (she's a fan) and when told that we didn't need 10 of them she started to hug them. Like you would a teddy bear. She had started to name them.

In the meat section we found Rib Eye roasts on sale for $3.99 lb. No. Way. I bought a 4 lb roast and will cut it into steaks for 3 or 4 meals. Beef Tenderloin was $4.99 lb, but last week it was $3.99. This isn't 'must eat today because it's about to expire' meat either. I was feeling kind of happy.

At the fish counter, Little neck clams were $6.99 lb. 22 were in a pound. Can't turn that down. 1 lb would make a nice treat for the Mister and I (we are the only ones who would eat them). Our cart was being filled through the course of the store. The sale prices were fantastic.

When we reached produce, strawberries were $1.49 a quart, they looked great too. Peaches were juicy and .99 lb. We stocked up on all kinds of fruits and veggies that were on special. The kids looked like they were in a candy store. Weasels love fruit.

Once we returned home the cannoli's were pulled out and devoured immediately. Wouldn't want them to get soggy. I started to steam the clams and melt the butter, as the Weasels claimed them as pets and started to name them. Middle Weasel cried as we ate her new best friends.

Later we pulled out RockBand and started taking turns having a family jam session. We were having a great time as I made sure dinner was on the stove (smoked keilbasa cooked with sliced potato and onion. Mr. Weasel and I schooled the Weasels in Buffet (the Jimmy variety), I stated that I didn't feel well. Reflux, like I haven't felt since pregnancy with the boy and indigestion were overtaking me. I rocked it through Volcano. I earned a 'flawless' with Margaritaville. I said to Mr. Weasel that I thought I would be sick. There was so much acid in my throat. I'm a trooper and pushed on. This is Buffet. We don't want the kids learning this stuff on the street after all. We continued with Cheeseburger In Paradise. About 4 lines into the song, I gently and calmly put the microphone down and proceeded to sprint through the house to the bathroom. This is where I lost my cookies actually cannolis.

Mr. Weasel went to grab towels I have no stinking idea why while Middle Weasel came in to 'help Mommy'. She wanted to hold back my hair like I do for her. It was already in a ponytail, but she is sweet nonetheless. Immediately her reaction was "Ewww, that's just sick!" and "Mom, that's soooooo nasty". Eh, she tried for sweet. I won't go into the TMI without making you laugh (at me not with me), so I will disclose that this was such a violent event that after 6 kids, my bladder couldn't take the extreme pressure. Yeah, I'm just waiting for you all to send the funny notes in the mail attached to a box of Depends. I was shaking and weak. Mr. Weasel ran a bath and got me upstairs. I cleaned up, put on some pajamas and crawled into my bed. Soon round two happened. Happened to the point reminiscent of college dry heaves. Happened just in time to soil my fresh clean PJ's and require a second bath. Go ahead, insert second depends joke here. Mr. Weasel put me to bed and stayed there with me. Even with the imminent threat of me soiling it - that's love.

This morning I am running a fever. I suspect stomach flu and not bad clams (no one else was sick, even after the cannoli - clam combo). I can hardly speak. All the acid managed to burn away the lining in my throat (I told you it was violent). Anyone who has met me in person will get a huge laugh out of that. It's pretty hard to keep these lips quiet.

That is unless you hand me a cannoli.

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23 comments:

Tara R. said...

You poor thing! Nothing worse than stomach flu... it does sound like you have a house full of nurses though. I hope you feel better very soon.

Melisa with one S said...

Aww, I hope you feel better very soon!

I wonder if someone in the Woodman's family put a curse on you for cheating. :)

Get rest! Drink fluids! (not Coors)

terri said...

Good thing you don't need a voice to write on your blog! So sorry you're not feeling well and I hope it passes quickly.

Tom said...

Sorry to hear that! I hope you feel better. I was going to hold all sorts of animosity about the Cannolis until I read that part.

I have also learned that if I'm going to bring home seafood, it's best not to let the kids see it and start naming them.

Michael's Mommy says we're flying to Chicago so we can get Ribeye that cheap.

Big Bad Daddy said...

Good Luck, the flu sucks. I sincerely hope it doesn't make the rounds through the house. You are committed to this blog thing though, that was some serious sharing.

Mike said...

Clams can do that to you. Always stay away from the shell fish.

NukeDad said...

No one else got sick? Then you obviously ate THE ONE clam that had the stomach flu. Or is it valve flu? Can't remember if clams have stomachs. I know they have kidneys. Hope you feel better soon; then you can have the rest of those clams for breakfast. Yum!

de-I said...

Stomach Flu - food poisoning - all those things - so unpleasant - hope you get well soon.

As an ex-Philly person I figured you would be more into Roman Games type of things like feeding people to the lions? Isn't that pretty much what they do in Philly for all their sports teams?

Weaselmomma said...

@ Tara ~ It's bad, but there is lots of love being thrown my way, almost too much.

@ Melisa ~ It's a conspiracy! Can't keep any liquids or solids down.

@ Terri ~ I felt strong enough to eat, big mistake.

@ Tom ~ Bring your family to visit and we will have a cannoli and ribeye feast.

@ Big Bad Daddy ~ So far so good. I figured you all deserved the funniest part after reading all the gross.

@ Mike ~ I love the shellfish, but it has to be fresh caught. I got spoiled growing up on the East Coast.

@ NukeDad ~ I may have had odd clam out. No one else is sick as of yet (flu anyway) but there is a cold thing going around the house. Note too self: never by discount shellfish!

Chris H said...

You have a lovely husband! Hope you are feeling a bit better now?

Melisa with one S said...

Get ready for a crowd o' folks coming over to check you out; Manic Mommy has thrown down a challenge for you...

(I'd recommend taking her up on it AFTER you're done vomiting.)

MaNiC MoMMy™ said...

Ooh, last time I got sick, it was from Taco Bell. Now I have sworn it off. But now I want a cannoli, and I don't even like 'em.

BTW, go see my reply to your puddles comment--too funny!

FEEL BETTER!

The Microblogologist said...

Food microbiologist time! It could be the clams and if it is it makes perfect sense that you were the only one to get sick since you mentioned you making them and not Mr. Weasel. You handled them raw, theoretically no one else did, cooking kills most of the bugs and some of their toxins. The same concept applies to botulism, many cases involve just the one who made the soup or whatever. The one cooking often tastes it along the way and before it has been adequately heated to kill the toxin. They get sick (sick is a huge understatement), everyone else is fine.

Of course the clams could be totally innocent, most food born pathogens take at least a day to cause symptoms and people tend to only think about the last thing they ate but in reality that potato salad from three days ago could be the source. One of several reasons it can take forever to try and isolate the source of an outbreak! Most people do not remember what they ate a week ago and most likely there is none of it left at that point for testing. Yup, epidemiologist is definitely a stressful job and I don't intend to get involved in that area of the field.

I hope this passes quickly! If you are still sick and not able to keep liquids down tomorrow I really think you should go see your doctor.

Vodka Mom said...

As i was reading this I was CRAVING food, until your incredible description of the BARFING and whatnot- my appetite was quashed.

i'll have to come reread it when I get hungry agai.


hope you feel better!!!

Sue said...

Bummer, Weaselmomma! Hope you are feeling better by now. I can't make a Depends comment, because the same thing happens to me. Rest and liquids are the best things.

RhondaLue said...

Weasel momma I feel so guilty smiling reading your blog when you are so sick! (hugs) feel better soon.

p.s. All seafood is of the devil. Nasty icky stuff. lol

Sabrae Carter said...

Looks like you found a store where you can actually take your kids! lol but you might not want to go there without intervention! lol

seashore subjects said...

That totally stinks, I know how you love a fresh cannoli. Hope you feel better today.

Bad Momma said...

Oh nooooo! Hope you are feeling better soon. I love cannolis!!! I have not had one in years. I think you deserve a "do-over" and when you are better, send Mr.Weasel back to Caputos for another batch!

Weaselmomma said...

@ Chris H ~ I hit the lottery with Mr. W. Monday morning and doing much better, thanks.

@ Melisa ~ I'll need to pull out the garlic to ward off vampires. I'll donate damnit!

@ Manic ~ How about if I donate blood in exchange for a cannoli?

@ Micro ~ Doing better now, stomach flu it was.

@ VodkaMom ~ That should be my ad campaign, for get South Beach, read WeaselMomma to lose weight!

@ Sue ~ Thanks for outing yourself and letting me know I am not alone, that rocks!

@ the rest of the commenters ~ Thanks. I am feeling better. Have a laugh and don't feel bad, that's why I posted. It's all for you baby!

The Microblogologist said...

So glad to hear it! Your symptoms started reminding me of mine when I had appendicitis. I kept insisting I had the "stomach flu" but Mom forced me to go to the doctor and he sent me to the ER. I wish I could eat a cannoli, I'll just have to live vicariously through you when you eat them without them making it a round trip instead of one way.

Mama Smurf said...

My mom makes THE best cannolis you'll ever taste! Seriously. The best. Makes her own shells too. The best.

Michelle said...

Uh-oh. Does this mean you won't be visiting my favorite store again? And did you see the GIANT cannoli they have sitting on top of the bakery thing with the Don't Touch This Is Not A Sample sign on it? And the great cheeses?

Here's hoping you feel better soon! Sorry I'm so ummm late in my blog reading.

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