Thursday, June 25, 2009

Bedding, Rodents and Fairies

It's 3 am. Do you know where my sheets are? Go ahead. take a guess.

My sheets are on the floor in the laundry room. I know. I know. You are all thinking "WeaselMomma, we know that you are an odd bird, but isn't that a rather strange place to keep your sheets at 3am?"

To that I say, "Not if they're wet".

You say, "but wouldn't you put them in the washing machine and not on the floor?"

And I say, "Not if the washer is full of Boy Weasels dirty clothes and detergent, but I forgot to actually turn it on last night".

And you say, "WeaselMomma, how/why did you wet the bed?".

And I say, "I didn't wet the bed. Smallest Weasel wet my bed".

And you say, "but doesn't Smallest Weasel have her own bed? and hasn't she been potty trained? She's is 5 years old ya know. Why would you let a 5 year old stealth bed wetter sleep in your bed?".

And I say, "but I didn't. Stealth bed wetter is also stealth sneak into Mom and Dad's bed in the middle of the night girl".

And then I say "Did you just call my kid a bed wetter? 'Cause she's not a bed wetter or at least not a serial bed wetter. Accidents happen. Like that one night, back in college.......oh nevermind.

And you say, "WeaselMomma, why are you so cranky this morning? Yeah, it's early, but you always get up stupid early, so what gives?"

And I say "because last night in the first time in like, forever, I stayed up until about 11pm reading a book that I won at June Clever Nirvana called "The Fey" by Claudia Hall Christian that had been signed and personalized for me".

And then I think to myself, but do not say out loud, because Mr. Weasel doesn't know yet about my decision to adopt a baby dwarf hamster who was born with only 3 paws in a surprise litter at a friends house, *side note* Honey, if you are reading this, know that I love you.

Oh, and I just realized that today marks the 1st Birthday of World of Weasels. I guess you call it a blogoversary. I was going to make a cake for all of you, but I decided to wash my sheets instead.

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34 comments:

Tom said...

I understand this. I understand it completely and thoroughly, and you have my deepest sympathies. It's 3:20 AM here, and Michael is watching Superman. No wetting the bed tonight here, just a bad dream; but many a night my wife or I have been here with wet sheets on the floor.

Melisa with one S said...

I'll make the cake while you do your laundry. I'm thinking something with rodents on it.

Happy blogoversary!

Kat said...

Happy Blogoversary! To many more years to come because lady? You rock. That was one hell of a funny post. Hope you will have a dry and peaceful night tonight :)

OhCaptain said...

Happy Blogaversary!

OhPrincess2 is a stealth girl in the middle of the night and loves to sneak into our bed, she's even wet it for us a couple of times.

Our door now locks.

You have my sympathies.

Laura said...

Happy Blogoversary WM!! Sorry about your night, but I'm happy you got to get lost in a good book! And you know I can relate to your laundry predicament, though mine is a bit different...my stealh bed-sneaker-inner-child still willigly wears pullups, but my occasional-accident-at-the-most-inconvenient-time child considers them punishment, so when she wets her TOP BUNK (while her ginormous beached-whale mommma is 34 weeks pregnant), I make HER strip the bed, & I wash the sheets (if I remember to turn the washer on) & I also, FINALLY, bought a backup mattress pad to buy myself an extra day. I INSIST on a pullup then night after an accident to buy myself an extra day's peace (the laundry room is never inactive that long, but the backache of making a top bunk deserves a break).

Hugs to you--loooove your blog--I read all my others every morning & save yours for last to top it off with a cherry & whipped cream!! :)

terri said...

Not to be redundant or anything, but... Happy Blogoversary!

I'd be cranky too if I had a 3 a.m. wet-bed wake-up call.

Oscar said...

You must have been "pissed" (I dont read other comments so I hope I'm the first to say that awful joke.

HEY We share blogoversaries!

Congratulations!

We're not as fancy as WOW, but Its been fun!

Momo Fali said...

Happy Birthday, World of Weasels!

This post made me feel better about only sleeping for ONE hour last night.

BusyDad said...

Happy Blogiversary! I'd say I'd drink to that, but first I'll drink in commiseration with your wet sheet ordeal. So I get two. Works out for me, I guess. :)

Jason said...

Happy Blogoversary!

Oddly enough this post reminded me of the night of my pseudo bachelor party...

The Microblogologist said...

Definitely a rude awakening, ew! Thank you for the year of laughs, tears, smiles, and of course Weasels!

Charlie on the PA Turnpike said...

You write as if you've been doing this for years longer.

Here's to many, many more!

Andrew's Daddies said...

Happy Blogaversary!!!!You're adopting a special needs rodent? You are an angel weaseal sent from the weasel heavens.

For god sake girl, put the keyboard down and wash the sheets...

Gertrude Groggins - said...

Once when I was 18 (!) I had a dream I was peeing and wet my mom's couch! I still haven't lived that one down.

Congrats on the blogoversary!!! I am SO glad you are in my blog list!!

surprised mom said...

Happy Blogversary WeaselMomma! Thanks for all the great posts! And thanks for all your encouragement!
As for your 3 a.m. wake-up call, you do have my sympathies. It's been awhile for me, but I do remember a couple of events like you described.
What I want to know is what Mr. Weasel's reaction was to you stripping the bed while he was sleeping, or the fact you had to strip the bed at 3 a.m.?

JonnyTam13 said...

Happy Blogoversary! I hope that when mine comes up in 6 months I get something that doesn't resemble wet sheets!

de-I said...

As usual you come up with proof that daily life is more interesting than fiction.

And while I think that it is an interesting innovation for birthdays and anniversaries to wash wetted sheets in the depths of the early, early morning, I think I'm skeptical that it will replace the cake as a tradition.

Mrs4444 said...

Happy Blogiversary, Weaselmomma!!!! I hope your sheets are clean by now...

Out-Numbered said...

My six year old came into our room the other night at 3am and went into our bathroom and peed on the floor. Good times...

DysFUNctional Mom said...

Happy Blogoversary! I would totally adopt that hamster too.

Bella Daddy said...

Well Well, Happy Happy Day to you! And hey, rather have some damn cake over clean sheets....come on...;-)

Doug @ Daddy's Tired said...

Ahh sleep...I can almost remember it...Everyday is not going to be sunny and bright, that's why we blog to let it all out on the table and relieve some of the pressure...Good post, and good luck with the sheets!

Craig said...

My family is talking about getting another pet, where did you find a handicap baby dwarf hamster. That sound pretty good. Happy blogotwitospheraversary.

PJ Mullen said...

Happy Blogaversary, you rock!

ciara said...

i want cake damn it! screw your sheets. lol i'm sorry you almost had to sleep in the wet spot. :-/ lmao

NukeDad said...

A year already? Time flies, doesn't it? Why, just 1 year ago I remember getting stalkerish comments and googling "restraining order". Just kiddin'. Glad to see that you've grown from a newbie blogger into the High Priestess of the Blogosphere with double my readership. Jealous? Moi? No, just vindictive. ;)

P.S. Buddy the NukeBeagle jumped on my bed with a little piece of meadow muffin on his paw which he promptly deposited on my sheets. I opened the washer to find the clothes I washed last night, then opened the dryer to find that the clothes I put in there last night are still wet since I FORGOT TO TURN THE DRYER ON! Yeah, 3 dryer loads means I'll be sleeping on the couch and the sheets will have to wait until tomorrow.

The Father of Five said...

Your laundry room sounds an awful lot like ours...

Happy Blogiversary!! I look forward to many years to come!

Vodka Mom said...

Happy blogiversary!!!!!

And, I was gonna guess that the sheets were hanging on the line. like mine were.


having a sheet party.

KWG said...

Oy vey. Bed wetting. When I was that age I slept walked and peed on my dirty clothes. Yikes.

Happy Blogiversary as well!

-Justin said...

I once tried to go potty in the trash compactor as a young sleepwalker. I have yet to have a funny story about my own kids. Totally sympathize, however!

Bad Momma said...

Happy Blogaversary! You Weasels sure know how to pull an "all-nighter"!

Mike said...

I'm a little late. Congrats on your one year of writing very funny stuff...

Michelle said...

Ahhh, welcome to my life -- up too late, up too early... and way too much laundry that I forgot to do. Happy (very belated) blogoversary!

Jillian Livingston said...

Looks like you have your hands full but I say bring on the three pawed hamster.

I hope that you are less confused than I am on your blogoversary.

Glad to find you.

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