A few weeks back Melisa wrote this post @ Suburban Scrawl, spelling out just how much she dislikes everything and everyone at her local super mega low mart that is where she does her shopping. I have been there and have to say she is right. It is a miserable experience.
I laughed myself half to death at her expense and suggested that we do a blogger outing to my local grocery store. The one that gives Disney world a serious run for the title of "Happiest Place on Earth".
We agreed to meet up this past Friday, at the only place that made sense for Tiara wearing bloggers to meet, Claire's. This way we could sift through the racks for clearance priced tiaras. Just because we're princesses doesn't mean we're not frugal! We had the store to ourselves with the exception of the 3 employees who were looking at us strangely as we tried on every tiara in the place. We donned our tiaras and headed for Woodman's (the SUPER market) where we would shop like royalty. Mr. Weasel would meet us there with the video camera and we would get a v-blog out of the day.
Being women that have our priorities in order, we decide to start in Woodman's liquor store while we wait for Mr. Weasel to arrive. They have a great selection at least 4x the size of any grocery store liquor department. We peruse the aisles giggling like school girls stalking the cute boy in class. I became downright giddy with laughter when Melisa popped with child like excitement at the rare find of 'He'brews ~ the chosen beer'. I totally lost it with laughter and all I could say was "you guys even have your own beer?????".
For a woman who 'doesn't drink that much' she sure is passionate about her booze. This lady knows what she likes.
I call Mr. Weasel to see what's taking so long "I'm on my way out the door". I can handle this, as we only live 2 minutes away, and Melisa and I move into the wine section. We laugh at the names on the labels(Wiener Dog White and Kick A** Red, just to name two) and debate whether or not to pick up some Manishevitz just for a laugh.
*Don't tell Melisa~but she and her tiara were attracting attention and stares from everyone.*
I call Mr. Weasel. He hasn't left yet. What's up with that. Yup, he's leaving now. Okay. We check out of liquors with lots of Holiday Cheer and didn't manage to get carded (what's up with that?), but we did get a few chuckles and move on to groceries where they have the hugest selections and the way cheapest prices in a clean, nice and friendly environment. I have heard this place referred to as 'Trader Joe's on crack". And it is, only cheaper. We swagger through breads and produce where Melisa begins to fall in love with this place in much more than a platonic way.
Mr. Weasel calls. "where are my car keys?". He hasn't left yet??????? " They are on the mantle, Where we keep them". "Ummmm, No they're not", is his only reply and he continues looking. Ugh. I shake my head and we girls keep shopping. We head off into meats (and yes, I managed to touch Melisa's meat. I did it when she wasn't looking so I wouldn't get my butt kicked) and run into a guy pimping samples of this stuff with fried pork. I can't help but comment as we pass "Snap-pay". "Pork for the Princess?" was his immediate retort as he offers me a sample on a toothpick. Of course we start laughing yet again. It turns out that this guy is the creator and his sauce is pretty darn good. I ask Melisa if she wants to try one, because it is yummy. She answers, "No, I can't. But you go ahead". Once again I am in stitches. This hanging out with a Jew thing is gonna take some getting used to.
I call Mr. Weasel. "didja find your keys yet?". Nope. I look at Melisa, "I don't think he's coming". So much we move on. This is my life. I don't even expect and different anymore. I offer Melisa that we can check out the hams, but remember to swiftly move passed bacon. I'm catching on, but we are getting loads of mileage out of my moronic tendencies.
We want some pictures, so we stop a couple of shelf stocking clerks and hand them the camera. They take our picture while trying to hide the fact that they think we're nuts. *People are still looking laughing and pointing at Melisa* We decide that all of the woman are jealous and all of the men are thinking 'don't let my wife see this'. We continue up and down the aisles, tossing necessities into our carts and grabbing all of our baking supplies. $2.00 a pound for butter, you can't beat that price.
I call Mr. Weasel. "Find 'em yet?". Nope. "You do know that you have 10 minutes to get Smallest Weasel to school". Oops, no. He forgot. Ugh. Melisa and I rush through the remainder of our lists and hurry into the checkout lanes. We figured out that thanks to Woodman's I spend about the same amount to feed my family of 7 that she spends to feed 4.
On the way out one woman stopped us to say that she loves the tiaras and what a fun idea.
I think Melisa found her new grocery store and I found a new shopping buddy. You have never had so much fun doing something so mundane! This was a shopping trip fit for a princess.
I rush home to get Smallest Weasel to school. She was a little late, but it's pre-school - no big deal. When I returned home what do I see????? Wanna guess????? Go ahead, I'll wait..........................................................
MR. WEASELS' CAR KEYS! RIGHT THERE ON THE MANTLE WHERE WE KEEP THEM!!!!!!!
I have a feeling that Melisa and I will be doing this again very soon. You have to check out her sister post to this if you want a good laugh and a behind the scenes look at the WeaselMomma.
*I so forgot all about about the recharging the batteries excuse*
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