Ahhh, Thanksgiving. A Time to come together with family and celebrate all of the blessings we have. A day to remember, appreciate and show gratitude for yet having survived another year. A day that more times than not is filled with landmines just waiting to be stepped on.
When spending the holiday with relatives, either by blood or marriage, there is always going to be sniper fire. Comments from Aunt Cookie, who still can't believe he married that little tramp, to the effect of "MMMMM, this tastes wonderful. It's not nearly as dry as it looks" and the inevitable small talk around the wine bottle about "little Susie's boobies are starting to bud". The conversation throughout the day will continually go downhill and you will soon get to hear all about Grandpa Dan's prostate in more detail than you can digest through.
You will hear all the play by play of cousin Lucy and her husband Jed's infertility issues, as Aunt Betsy is in the corner telling everyone that they can't conceive because Lucy was a tramp in college. Speculation and rumor of divorce will be whispered about Mike and Sara because they didn't accept the invitation to dinner. In reality, they were smart enough to avoid this whole scene in favor of 4 nights in the Bahamas.
Soon desert will be served. As Uncle Lou scoffs down his 3rd piece of homemade pie, Aunt Cookie asks "where did you buy the pie? I hope you didn't pay too much, it's a bit too sweet". You want to scream, but you have to play nice. You try to hide in the bathroom to take a few deep breaths only to find it occupied with Aunt Betsy and a colitis attack. Aunt Cookie blames the gravy.
In order to protect ourselves, here in Weaselville we start the day with bloody Mary's. They are just enough armour to deflect the scathing comments and numb the conversation. They take the edge off of an exhausting day. A huge debt of gratitude goes out to my sister-in-law for bringing this tradition to our family.
Her and now, I propose to you a new national holiday ~Grateful Friday~(to be celebrated on the 4th Friday of November) in order to appreciate and mock our relatives from a distance while enjoying a meal with friends. A day to show gratitude for the people we hang out with by choice, not just by birth or marriage. A day to celebrate and be grateful for having survived another Thanksgiving. We already have the day off of work. We already have dinner made, and the Bloody Mary's can be for fun and not just medicinal.
And a huge shout out to BadMomma who has a brilliantly funny Thanksgiving Survival Guide.
Posts
12 comments:
Thanks for the shout-out! Sounds like fun times ahead in the World of Weasels!
Another thing to look forward to is the start of the "Holiday Newsletters". I think I feel a contest coming on!!! I'll post the rules later this weekend!
Good times! Good times. You're cracking me up!
We have had so many "Black Fridays" (not having anything to do with the sales at the mall) and "Black Thanksgivings" that we are going out to eat on Thanksgiving, with only my sister and our parents, who invited themselves up from Tennessee but will probably be fine. :) It's when we combine families (hubby's & mine) that we have a *wee* bit o' tension.
Texas de Brazil, here we come!
You should probably add a rule about Grateful Friday... a no blogging rule. After all those bloody mary's, I'd probably write all kinds of nasty stuff about my SILs and ruin my nice girl image.
OMG, have you been sneaking a peek at my holidays? It's almost like you've been a fly on the wall.
Hmm, I think I'm having a Bloody Mary before I head to the inlaws this year.
Thanksgiving at your house just sounds like a blast.
Our Friday's tend to be the day we have to apologize to the family for what was said after too many glasses of (pick the libation of choice).
As soon as I read Bloody Mary's outloud, my wife said "That sounds good." Going to be fun around here this year...
I've got way too much driving to do every year. My wife comes from a family that really knows how to get along, they have separate dinners all over the place...sigh.
Normally, I do not appreciate music on blogs, but yours...it's wonderful. :) Great post; makes me grateful that we only get together as siblings and kids (no old farts yet!)
In our home, the tradition has been to make a mincemeat pie from scratch, adding a bit of brandy and a bit of rum, some apples and raisins, a bit more rum, spices, brandy, etc. Did I mention that you have to sample your mixture constantly? By the time it's ready, so are you!
Wow, I think your family might beat out mine on the snarky comments. I just have the morons and the clueless. The best I've heard so far is that one aunt and uncle want my parents to reimburse them for the gas to drive to my parents' house. I suggested my parents give them a bill for the dinner. I love Thanksgiving....
@ BadMomma ~ I look forward to hearing about it.
@ Warn ~ it's my pleasure.
@ Melisa ~ I love Brazilian Steakhouses.
@ Terri ~ That's a smart rule.
@ Melissa ~ Yeah, there are secret cameras.
@ Mike ~ It's a great tradition, and a wonderful way to start the day.
@ Captain ~ I am glad gas prices have dropped for you.
@ Mrs4444 ~ If there is music on my blog, it's news to me. What are you drinking?
@ Tom ~ I hope you get to make the pie this year.
@ Michelle ~ That sounds like a fun bunch to have dinner with.
Until my grandparents (Mom's parents) retired and moved down to Florida we always had Christmas Eve and Christmas with them. Daddy's favorite Christmas with them was the time he had some vodka and took a few shots before we left. He was smiling, then fell asleep in a chair (think he was still smiling), and woke up and we went home. We usually went to his Mom's for thanksgiving, 4 hour drive but way better company! Still working on my next FWM post, might hang onto her even after it is done since I probably won't get to go visit the family this year as I am likely not getting over this stupid plague in time, she can have dinner with me =)!
Post a Comment