Monday, August 10, 2009

Wait, I Didn't Order Room Service

When Mr. Weasel and I wed, 16+ years ago, we did so with all the bells and whistles due a princess and held our reception at a swanky resort where we would also be spending our honeymoon.

We actually could never have afforded this posh hotel, even now. However, my mother was quite a wheeler and dealer and happened to work at the resort. She had made friends with all the right department heads and made a good name for herself as a hard worker. Thus, she was able to secure an extremely lavish venue for our special day. Complete with church basement pricing.

Sounds good doesn't it? Well, it has some drawbacks too. I had been living about 1000 miles away at the time. The only decision I (or the soon to be Mr.) was included in making was via phone and consisted of "chicken of Beef?". We chose beef. I was informed that we were wrong in our choice and that we would have "chicken or beef with a fish option too". No big deal, right?

Most of my family, both immediate and extended, would also be traveling great distances to attend. I was grateful that they would go to such lengths to be there. Most of the family decided to turn it into their family's vacation and with such cut rates prices at this wonderful resort, you can guess where everyone decided to stay. No big deal right?

Everything went off without a hitch (well, there was one). The day was special and beautiful. We all had a wonderful time and after leaving the reception as the new Mr. and Mrs. Weasel, all we had to do was take the elevator upstairs to our honeymoon suite, where we found no less than 3 bottles of champagne waiting for us. Very Nice.

That is until the knock on our sweet suite door at 7:00 the next morning waking us up and forcing a groggy stagger around the room to locate some robes as the muffled reverb of 'room service' bounced off the walls around us.

I cured my disrobedness and answered the door to find a room service cart filled with fresh fruits, bagels, muffins and chocolate covered strawberries pushed into the room by none other than my mother.

Seriously. My mother. The Mr.'s new Mother-in-Law. In our honeymoon suite. Preparing the full service, napkin laying, high end room service treatment that we did not order. All while the Mr. and I are wearing nothing more than our all together suits and terrycloth robes. Can you say awkward?

We sat in the living room area, with full open view of our tussled sheets, while good 'ol mom continued to serve and then decided to sit down and visit a bit. I swear, you just can't make this stuff up.

I was mortified and had an odd fear that she was here in the old Italian tradition of inspecting the sheets to confirm the bride's purity and the groom's
virility before hanging said sheets over the balcony for the entirety of the village to view, and I'm not even Italian!

Dearest mother continued this morning ritual for all 4 days of our stay. I did mention to her, more than once, that this was weird and we did not require room service. My statements held as much weight as my choice of serving beef at the reception did.

Over the course of those 4 days, we didn't indulge in all of the amenities that the resort had to offer and not solely for the reasons you are thinking either. We tried to head for the beautiful outdoor pool area, only to spot my brothers and cousins hanging out poolside. We changed our dinner plans to offsite when we discovered aunts and uncles would be dining at our original choices. We found ourselves regularly sharing elevator rides with family members who anxiously asked about our plans and recaps of our days.

It's not that we didn't want to see any of these people. We really do like them, but we couldn't find any privacy even in our own hotel room. This was our honeymoon after all. A little space and privacy wasn't out of order.

And that my dear readers is why we have always continued to live at least 10 hours away from any of them for the past 16+ years.

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26 comments:

Sadia said...

That's fantastic ... and exactly why we have an ocean between my nuclear family and the rest of my family. My hubby's family, however, is welcome to live in my gust room indefinitely. They're fantastic AND respect our privacy.

Janie Woods said...

Hahahaha!! We actually had our big honeymoon four months later because everyone stayed at the same hotel we were in Vegas! How funny!!!

Gertrude Groggins - said...

Happy Monday morning! I left you an award over on my blog...
Have a great week!

Teacher Tom said...

AAAAAAAAAAAArg!

I'm so glad we just went to the justice of the peace and snuck away to Levenworth, Washington for a week. I'm afraid the MIL's presence would have lead to an immediate annulment.

Busy-Dad-E said...

Although according to Raymond (Romano), by being 10 hours away from family you live in Zone 3, which means that when they to visit they become overnight guests.

From previous posts, it sounds like your children have taken over your mother's role of interrupting you and Mr. W. during special occasions.

WeaselMomma said...

@ Sadia ~ An ocean, that's smart, until they come for an extended visit.

@ Janie ~ It's just not right without privacy.

@ Gertrude ~ I am honored, thank you.

@ Teacher Tom ~ The Mr. must really love me to put up with this kind of thing.

@ BusyDad-E ~ And yet somehow we managed to have 6 kids. Whouda thunk it?

Cheffie-Mom said...

Speaking of chicken or beef - check out my post! LOL! http://www.dishingwithdebbie.com/wordpress/2009/08/05/thursday-thoughtable-53/

Melisa Wells said...

hahahahaha...

You poor thing. At least it made a honeymoon story that you CAN tell others. Most people don't have a story they can publicly write about. ;)

Hannah Hammonds said...

Ha! This is so funny, because I can totally relate! We spent our honeymoon with my in-laws (hubby's parents). Granted they traveled all the way from NZ to be with us on the big day and wanted to spend time with us, but couldn't their hotel room been down the hall a bit???

Mike Sullivan said...

Mother/MIL at 0700 the day after the wedding??? You are an absolute saint for not having committed matricide. Did Mr. Weasel wonder, "Oh, crap. What have I gotten myself into?"

Captain Dumbass said...

Family is wonderful, from a distance.

Joanie said...

Wow! Talk about awkward!

de-I said...

Seems to me that the two of you could use a second/real honeymoon!

SurprisedMom said...

I never heard this story and I'm still laughing, with you not at you of course.
Well, I'm so glad I took my honeymoon a state away and all my relatives stayed home.
Dear God, your MOTHER?

Anonymous said...

And that, my friend, is EXACTLY why we decided on NOT doing a destination wedding/honeymoon, HAH!

My mom is crazy enough, and she's only 30 minutes away! *shivers*

Putting the FUN in DysFUNctional said...

OMG! I don't blame you for living far, far away. That is NOT a good way to make a first impression!

WeaselMomma said...

@ Cheffie ~ I did see you v-post. I had a hard time making out the dialogue though.

@ Melisa ~ and I got a post out of the deal.

@ Hannah ~ I feel your pain.

@ Michael ~ He must really love me to think I was still worth it.

@ Captain ~ Absence makes the heart grow fonder. I just grow fonder of their absence.

@ Joanie ~ Oh, it really was.

@ de-I ~ I love that idea. Now all I need is time, money and childcare.

@ Surprised ~ That woman was a piece of work.

@ Heather ~ That was smart.

@ DysFunctional ~ It was an interesting way to spend the rest of our lives.

Gertrude Groggins - said...

Oh my! I just was catching up on blogreading...
We live 1/2 mile from my MIL. My husband brought her along for our last anniversary dinner. Nice restaurant. She sat down, ordered, waited about 2.4 minutes and then started complaining that she didn't have her food.
I asked my husband, "WHY!?" He said... "I told her we were going out for our anniversary and she asked if she could go. Was I supposed to tell her no?" pfft!

Wendy said...

LOL. Great story! I can relate. My husband and I were supposed to get married in March but we took a trip to Vegas in November with my mom and the two of them talked me into getting married then instead of doing the planned wedding in March. So, my mom was WITH US on our honeymoon IN OUR SUITE. Too weird. :)

(At least it was one of those two bedroom thingys with a living room. Strange, but bearable.)

NukeDad said...

The only thing that could be worse is if you were to tell us that your Granmother felt you up like in "Sixteen Candles." Hanging the sheets over the balcony for the whole village to see? Classic. Made me think of "The Loneliest Runner", Michael Landon's story of his childhood when he was a bed-wetter and his mother would hang his sheets out his window for all to see. He would run home as fast as he could to try and get it down before his friends saw it.

seashore subjects said...

What a romantic honeymoon! Did she do this to all of your sibs or were you the lucky one here?

Jack Steiner said...

I would have had to kill my MIL for doing that.

chess said...

It's been a while since I used this acronym, but ROFLMAO.

You guys never said a word about that! I remember your Mom got somewhat miffed at our... uh... irreverence, when we had an impromptu conga line in the church... maybe she was just making sure *that* didn't happen anymore. :)

WeaselMomma said...

@ Gertrude ~ I feel for you and your hubby both.

@ Wendy ~ YOU WIN! That is way weirder.

@ NukeDad ~ I felt very lucky not to be Italian that day.

@ Seashore ~ I won the lucky prize on this one.

@ Jack ~ Damn shame you weren't there to help us out.

@ Chess ~ I had forgotten all about the conga line!

As Cape Cod Turns said...

Ha ha, that made me chuckle. My mom would have done the same thing!!!

Bad Momma said...

Too funny! Makes me glad we eloped!

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