Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Disaster Response and Red Tape

I wanted to post yesterday, but spent all day holding on the phone instead. You will understand in a minute. Two nights ago, while the NukeFamily enjoyed a night at the ball park, Eldest Weasel hosted a Hollywood Movies themed sleepover party. She somehow had coerced me into letting her invite 7 other 14 year old girls to spend 18 hours in my home. Between you and I, I think she had drugged me.

So starting at about 5 p.m., they started descending on my home like hungry locusts, dressed like they were going to the Oscars. Mr. Weasel made up some burgers and hot dogs on the grill. We pulled out baked beans, chips and all the fixins. They whipped through the food like Tazmanian devils then made a bee-line for the basement where the younger Weasels had been forbidden to pester them. Mr. Weasel and I put the kitchen back in working order and prepared for the 'next wave'.



sleepover 1

When the gaggle of girls was ready work on the purse decorating craft Eldest had prepared and settle in with movies in the living room, I took the others upstairs to watch Shark Week on the Discovery Channel and have their own sleepover in Mom and Dad's room. All was good, noise level reasonable, no worries.
When I woke up in the morning this is what I saw:

And this is what had happened in the Kitchen:


Well the first call I made was to our Home Owners Insurance agent. After reviewing our policy she informed me that we do not have a rider in our policy for this type of damage. Then she suggested that we call FEMA.I called FEMA and after quite some time on hold through the automated system, spoke to a person who told me that the Governor would have to declare a "State of Emergency" before they could help with clean-up.
So, I called the Governor. I remained on hold as he was speaking with legal counsel about his corruption investigation. So I held on the line while he prepared his Grand Jury Testimony. I asked for the "State of Emergency", but he said this did not qualify as an "Act of God". That only a Poltergeist could have caused that kind of damage in such a short time. Then suggested that I call a Catholic Priest/Exorcist.
I Spoke with the Diocese Exorcist. He said that the Church is hesitant to get involved without months of investigation. I told him I can't live like this for months. He told me the next best thing to do was go outside and have a beer. So that's what I did!

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Tom said...

After all of that, you only had one??? It would have been a rack of mai tais and a shot of Tequila for me.

Weaselmomma said...

I am only admitting to one!LOL

Angel said...

Yes, I would have needed more than ONE! haha
What would we do without the good ol' alcohol!

BusyDad said...

I have only heard of the infamous "Threat Level Beer" mentioned in hushed tones at the Pentagon. They never thought it could happen. My thoughts are with you and your city in this time of crisis. Need more beer?

Weaselmomma said...

Yes BD, send in reinforcements. Preferably the Coors Light Battalion.

nukedad said...

The link on your comment sent it to the spam folder, and then to the post; still trying to figure out what happened.

Thanks for the link love! Sounds like the party was a success! The Nukeboys have had multiple sleepovers before, but never more than a total of 4 guests. You are a brave woman.

Weaselmomma said...

NukeDad, there is a fine line between brave and stupid.

Big Bad Daddy said...

It frightens me to think this will be my life in a few years. I'm thankful I own good headphones.....

Half-Past Kissin' Time said...

I want to see the purses!! If you search my site for "Birthday Party," you should find an April post on Kendall's birthday party, which reminds me of yours, but with a couple variations. Sounds like you clearly held your own, but if you need ideas for the future....and feel crazy again, check it out!

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